Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy quotes

View Quote Veronica Corningstone: [Picks up phone] Veronica Corningstone.
Ron Burgundy: Hello. This is your doctor. I have your pregnancy results here, and guess what? You, you got knocked up, so you should probably get out of news.
Veronica Corningstone: Who is this!?
Ron Burgundy: This is Doctor Chim... Dr. Chim Richalds... Richalds.
Veronica Corningstone: Is this you Ron!?
Ron Burgundy: I'm a professional doctor, you saw me.. you don't remember. You were drunk. You should.. you should go, you should get out of news.
Veronica Corningstone: This is pathetic.
Ron Burgundy: You're pathetic. [hangs up]
Champ Kind: How'd it go?
Ron Burgundy: I think she bought it.

View Quote Veronica Corningstone: Mr. Burgundy, I am a professional and I would like to do my job.
Ron Burgundy: Big deal! I am very professional!
Veronica Corningstone: Mr. Burgundy, you are acting like a baby.
Ron Burgundy: I'm not a baby, I'm a MAN, I am an ANCHORMAN!
Veronica Corningstone: You are not a man. You are a big fat joke!
Ron Burgundy: I'm a man who discovered the wheel and built the Eiffel Tower out of metal and brawn. That's what kind of man I am. You're just a woman with a small brain. With a brain a third the size of us. It's science.

View Quote Veronica Corningstone: My God, what is that smell?
Brian Fantana: That's the smell of desire my lady.
Veronica Corningstone: God no, it smells like, like a used diaper... filled with Indian food! Oh, excuse me.
Brian Fantana: You know, desire smells like that to some people
Garth Holliday: What is that? Smells like a turd covered in burnt hair.
News Station Employee: It smells like Bigfoot's dick!
(cut to Brian being jet-hosed) Hoser: This is worse than when that raccoon got in the photocopier!

View Quote I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'RE YELLING ABOUT!!!

View Quote LOUD NOISES!!!

View Quote [after Brick talks about bears] Oh that's just great! You hear that, Ed? BEARS! Now you are putting the whole station in jeopardy.

View Quote [after jumping into the kodiak bear pit at the San Diego Zoo] I immediately regret this decision.

View Quote [after the rest of the team state their opposition to his dating Veronica Corningstone] I know that one day we will be married on top of a mountain, and there will to be flutes playing and trombones and flowers and garlands of fresh......... herbs. And we will dance... until the sun rises! And then our children will form a family band, and we will tour the countryside and you won't be invited!

View Quote [describing Veronica] Oooh, she has got a big ole' behind! I mean, I'd like to slap some barbecue sauce on that big ol' butt and just uh burr burr burr burr burrrr. OOwwwwooooo!!!!

View Quote [having heard a passer-by insult his Sex Panther cologne]...The mood is tense, Fantana!

View Quote [looking at his reflection in the mirror] Mmmmm... I look good. I mean really good. Hey, everyone! Come and see how good I look!

View Quote [on the phone with his son] Put down the gun, and let the marching band go. We'll play it off as a prank.

View Quote [on the phone] I have no idea where he would have gotten ahold of German pornography. But you and I are mature adults; we've both seen our share of pornographic materials. Oh, you never have? Of course you haven't, how stupid of me. Neither have I. I was just speaking in generalities. Right. I'll stop by the school a little later, Sister Margaret. Bye.

View Quote [opposing women in the newsroom] I read somewhere that their periods attract bears. The bears can smell the menstruation.

View Quote [riding a bear] Hey, Ron! I'm riding a furry tractor!