The Big Lebowski quotes

View Quote [Opening lines] Way out west there was this fella I wanna tell ya about. Fella by the name of Jeff Lebowski. At least that was the handle his loving parents gave him, but he never had much use for it himself. This Lebowski, he called himself The Dude. Now, "Dude", there's a name no one would self-apply where I come from. But then, there was a lot about the Dude that didn't make a whole lot of sense to me. And a lot about where he lived, likewise. But then again, maybe that's why I found the place so durned interestin'. They call Los Angeles the "City Of Angels", but I didn't find it to be that, exactly. But I'll allow it as there are some nice folks there. 'Course, I can't say I seen London, and I never been to France. And I ain't never seen no Queen in her damned undies, as a fella says. But I'll tell you what... after seein' Los Angeles, and this here story I'm about to unfold, well, I guess I seen somethin' every bit as stupefyin' as you'd see in any of them other places. And in English, too. So I can die with a smile on my face, without feelin' like the good Lord gypped me. Now this here story I'm about to unfold took place back in the early '90s - just about the time of our conflict with Saddam and the I-raqis. I only mention it because sometimes there's a man... I won't say a hero, 'cause what's a hero? But sometimes, there's a man – and I'm talkin' about the Dude here – sometimes, there's a man, well, he's the man for his time and place. He fits right in there. And that's the Dude. In Los Angeles. And even if he's a lazy man – and the Dude was most certainly that. Quite possibly the laziest in Los Angeles County, which would place him high in the runnin' for laziest worldwide – Sometimes there's a man... Sometimes, there's a man. Ah, I lost my train of thought here. But... aw, hell. I done introduced him enough.

View Quote [Responding to a rhetorical statement by Maude Lebowski about where the plot of the porno was going to lead] He fixes the cable?

View Quote [To camera] 'The Dude abides'. Dunno about you, but I take comfort in those words. It's good knowin' he's out there. The Dude. Takin' 'er easy for all us sinners. Shoosh. I sure hope he makes the finals.

View Quote [While being shoved into a limo] Hey! Careful, man, there's a beverage here!

View Quote Also Dude, let's not forget, let's NOT forget that keeping wildlife, um... an amphibious rodent, for... um, you know domestic... within the city... that ain't legal either.

View Quote And what the **** was all that about Vietnam, man!? What the **** does anything have to do with Vietnam!? What the **** are you talking about!?

View Quote And, I would like my undies back

View Quote Calmer than you are....

View Quote Darkness warshed over the Dude - darker'n a black steer's tuchus on a moonless prairie night. There was no bottom.

View Quote Do you see what happens, Larry, WHEN YOU **** A STRANGER IN THE ASS? (proceeds to smash up what he believes is Larry's new Corvette parked in the street) THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS, LARRY! THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU **** A STRANGER IN THE ASS!

View Quote Does the Pope shit in the woods?

View Quote Donny, you're out of your element!

View Quote Eight year olds, Dude.

View Quote Everything's a ****ing travesty with you, man!

View Quote Fair?? Who's the ****ing nihilists around here, you bunch of crybabies?