The Boondock Saints quotes

View Quote "Symbology"? Well, now that Duffy's relinquished his King Bonehead crown, I see we have a new heir to the throne. The word I believe you're looking for is "symbolism".

View Quote Det. Greenly: [talking to a dead body] Where you goin'? No where!

View Quote Doc: ****! Ass!

View Quote Doc: Why don't you make like a tree, and get the **** outta here?

View Quote Monsignor: And I am reminded on this holy day of the sad story of Kitty Genovese. As you all may remember, long time ago almost 30 years ago. This poor soul cried out for help time and time again, but no person answered their calls. Though many saw, no one so much as called the police. They all just watched as Kitty was being stabbed to death in broad daylight. They watched as her assailant walked away. Now, we must all fear evil men, but there is another kind of evil, which we must fear most, and that is, the indifference of good men.

View Quote On the wall while in the weapon room: While the wicked stand confounded, Call me with thy saints surrounded.

View Quote Connor: How far are we going to take this, Da?
Il Duce: The question is not how far. The question is, do you possess the constitution, the depth of faith, to go as far as is needed?

View Quote Connor: Now you will receive us.
Murphy: We do not ask for your poor, or your hungry.
Connor: We do not want your tired and sick.
Murphy: It is your corrupt we claim.
Connor: It is your evil that will be sought by us.
Murphy: With every breath, we shall hunt them down.
Connor: Each day we will spill their blood, 'til it rains down from the skies.
Murphy: Do not kill. Do not rape. Do not steal. These are principles which every man of every faith can embrace.
Connor: These are not polite suggestions, these are codes of behavior, and those of you that ignore them will pay the dearest cost.
Murphy: There are varying degrees of evil. We urge you lesser forms of filth, not to push the bounds and cross over, into true corruption, into our domain.

Connor: For if you do, one day you will look behind you and you will see we three, and on that day you will reap it.
Murphy: And we will send you to whatever god you wish.

View Quote Deleted Scene:
Mom Calls From Ireland
(phone rings, and Connor answers it)
Connor: Hello.
Mom: Connor, izzat you?
Connor: Mother, is that you?
Mom: Is that worthless brother of yours there? I want ya both to hear this.
Murphy: There's no ****ing hot water, man.
Connor: Shut it, it's Ma.
Mom: It's all your fault. Both o' ya little bas****. I was a fool to believe you'd give me any peace. The day your da left us, when you were almost too young to remember, he said the two of ya would do me right and make me proud. Well, he was wrong...and I got nothing to live for!
Connor: What are you saying? You're talking crazy here!
Murphy: What's the problem?
Mom: I finally found your da's old army revolver, Connor.
Connor: Look, Ma, what are you doing with Da's gun?
Murphy: Da's gun, what the ****?
Mom: I got it to me head now.
Connor: What the hell are you doing?
Murphy: What the ****??? (motions to Connor to tell him what's going on on the phone)
Mom: I wanna tell you one last thing before I pull the trigger.
Connor: Pull the trigger?!?! Have you lost it woman?!?! Now get ahold of yourself!!
Murphy: (runs and grabs pants) No, Ma, wait!
Connor: Listen to Connor now, I'm talking some sense into ya!!! Listen to me!!!
Murphy: Ma!! Ma!! Ma!!
Mom: I BLAME YOU!!!!!
Connor and Murphy: No! Ma! Jesus Christ, Ma! Don't ****ing pull it!! I swear to ****ing God!! Jesus Christ, Ma-
(Mom steps outside with gun and shoots it in the air, Connor drops phone)
Connor and Murphy: (scrambling after phone) Jesus ****ing Christ!! MA!! MA?!?! MA?? MA??? MA?!?!
Mom: giggles muffledly, then busts out laughing and coughing
Murphy: Christ, Ma, that was a good one.
Connor: Evil woman.
Mom: Oh, Jesus!! No, Ma, no!! Christ, Ma, no!!!
Murphy: She's quite proud of herself.
Connor: Well of course she is!
Mom: Okay, seriously I want you both to listen to me now.
Murphy: We're both here, Ma.
Connor: What is it? We're here.
Mom: It's only 11 here boys, so I got lots more drinking to do with your worthless relatives down at the Anvil.
Murphy: Just called to torture us, did ya?
Connor: Ma, how's Uncle Civial?
Mom: Well, you know how it is with him. Always complainin' he's never turning a profit on St. Patty's. Whole damn family goes down there with no money 'cause we know he can't bear to charge us. But he's been having a drink or two himself. Been up the waitress's skirt all night, poor girl.
Connor: Well, that's Uncle Civial for ya.
Murphy: You tell him to take it easy with that, Ma. He's gotta learn to respect women, the way Connor does.
Connor: Oh, Jesus.
Murphy: I gave him his first lesson in sensitivity just today, actually.
Connor: Oh, Christ, don't even say it, you little bastard!
Murphy: He got beat up by a girl.
Connor: Oh, if that was a girl, I wanna see some papers. Ma, she had to be just pre-operative, for Christ ****ing sake!
Mom: Lord's ****ing name!
Connor and Murphy: Hail Mary, full of Grace...
Mom: What'd ya do, Connor?
Connor: I tried to make friends, didn't I, and she gave me a shot to the nuts!!
Mom: Why...That dirty bitch! Well, I hope you trounced her a good one!
Connor: Well, dirty bitch is right, ya know, I did-
Murphy: Don't you worry, Ma, I respected the hell out of her for ya.
Connor: Oh, Macho Murph, ya.
Mom: Well, listen. I know how my boys take to scrappin' when they take to drinkin'.
Murphy: Yes, Mother.
Mom: I mean it now. I carried the two of ya little bas**** around in my belly at the same time, ya ungrateful piss-ants! You ruined my girlish figure in one fell swoop, and then ya sucked me dry. My tits are hanging down to my ankles! I'm trippin' over them for Christ's sakes so you listen to me. No fightin'.
Connor: Yes, Mother.
Mom: Promise me, boys.
Murphy: We promise.
Connor: We promise, Mother.
Mom: Well, there's my boys. Oh shit! Gotta go. Looks like I caused a ruckus with that shot, half the damn neighborhood's coming.
Murphy: Alright. Love ya, Ma. Hey, listen, before you go, just give us the goods, huh, Ma? Please?
Connor: Hey come on now, Ma, it's been 27 years.
Mom: Ah, still bickerin' over that, huh?
Connor: Well, of course we are, now out with it. Come on, now, tell us: who came out first?
Mom: Alright. I suppose ya have the right to know. Are ya ready?
Connor: Go on!!
Murphy: Yeah!
Mom: The one with the bigger ****. (erupts into laughter and hangs up the phone)
Connor: What? What the **** is that? That's your ****ing mother talking like that!
Murphy: That's your ****ing mother.
Connor: ****in' hell!
(Murphy looks at the naked Connor walking off to get his beer and grins)
Connor: (looks down) Don't even ****in' start. I've had ice on mine, alright? ****.

View Quote Det. Dolly: So, what's the symbology there?
Paul Smecker: Symbology? Now that Duffy's relinquished his "King Bonehead" crown, I see we have an heir to the throne. I'm sure the word you were looking for was "symbolism". What is the ssssymbolism there? Let me explain it to you. In Greek and Roman mythology, when you died, you would have to pay the toll to Charon, the boatman who ferried you across to the gates of judgment. This made sure the dead came to atone for what they did during their lives, Detective Dollypoposkallius.
Det. Dolly: Jesus, you're the first one that ever got that!
Paul Smecker: Yeah, well, I'm an expert in ... nameology!

View Quote Det. Greenly: What if it was just one guy with six guns?
Paul Smecker: Why don't you let me do the thinkin', huh, genius?

View Quote Doc: You know what they say: People in glass houses sink sh... sh... sh... ships.
Rocco: I got to buy you like a proverb book or something, because this mix 'n' match shit's gotta go.
Doc: What?
Connor: Well, a penny saved is worth two in the bush, isn't it?
Murphy: And don't cross the road if you can't get out of the kitchen.

View Quote Donna: Where's my cat?
Rocco: I killed your cat you druggie bitch.
Donna: What? Why?
Rocco: Because I felt it would bring closure to our relationship.
Donna: You killed my... my...
Rocco: Your what!? Your ****ing what bitch. God dammit I'll shoot myself in the head if you can tell me that cat's name. Go ahead. Your what!? Your precious little...
Donna: Skip... Skippy! Skippy!
Rocco: Aww...Jesus! what color was it bitch?!
Rayvie: Hey, don't ****ing yell at her like that!
Rocco: SHUT YOUR FAT ASS, RAYVIE! I can't go and buy a pack of smokes without running into NINE GUYS YOU'VE ****ED!

View Quote Gay bartender: Oh, you've already had quite a bit, are you sure you...
Paul Smecker: Just pour the drink, you fairy ****.
Gay bartender: ...I can smell you.

View Quote Rocco: ****. You guys could do this every goddamn day.
Murphy: We're sorta like seven eleven, we're not always doing business, but we're always open.
Connor: Mmmm...That was nicely put.