Cabin Fever quotes

View Quote 'Bert has just been caught shoplifting by Tommy, the gruff shopkeeper.
Tommy: Boy, you want to give me one good reason why you would steal a Snickers bar?
Bert: The nougat?

View Quote Karen: That guy asked for our help, and we lit him on fire! You'll understand if I'm not in a particularly social mood.

View Quote Paul: Jeff! Jeff, it's the water! Wherever you are, don't drink the water!

View Quote Winston: You know what it's like when you go to a new town, and you're the new guy? All the girls see you walking down the street. They don't know you've got five pounds of ding-a-ling meat. They're looking for no commitment. You understand what I'm saying? I've heard that theory before. This is that town!

View Quote A stranger has just emerged from the woods with a dog that's barking threateningly
Karen:Wait... Is your dog friendly?

View Quote After her boyfriend suddenly abandons her, fearing she may have caught the disease, and runs off in to the forrest alone.
Marcy: ASSHOLE!

View Quote For no discernable reason, mentally handicapped Dennis suddenly begins to shout at Bert
Dennis :(yelling) Pancakes! PANCAKES! PANCAKES!
Bert: No, No Pancakes!
Dennis: PANCAKES!!!
Bert: No Pancakes!
Dennis suddenly begins doing a bizarre set of martial arts kicks

View Quote Karen and Paul are laying alone together on a raft on a lake
Karen: When you've known someone a long time, you just want to kiss them just to see if they're a good kisser. There's nothing wrong with that, right?

View Quote Karen suddenly sees Bert strolling of into the forest with a gun.
Karen: Bert, what the hell is that?
Bert: I'm going to go shoot some squirrels.
Paul: Why would you want to kill squirrels?
Bert: Because they're gay.
Karen: Bert, don't be a ****ing ****.
Bert: I'm kidding. I don't care if they're gay or straight, I'll kill them either way.

View Quote Out of the five students, two have begun bleeding from the deadly disease, and one seems close to death. Bert has driven off alone to find help but has become ill himself. Marcy's boyfriend, Jeff, has just abandoned her to quarantine himself alone in the forest, taking the beer with him. Marcy and Paul are now the only two people left in the cabin who have not yet shown signs of being ill.
Marcy: We're all going to get it. We're all going to get sick and Jeff's off in the woods getting drunk!
Paul: Bert's going to get help. Karen will be fine, I promise.
Marcy: It's like being on a plane when you know it's going to crash. Everybody around you is screaming and yelling, "We're going down! We're going down!" And all you really want to do is grab the person next to you and **** the shit out of them, because you know you're going to be dead soon, anyway.
Marcy looks over at Paul (who is sitting right beside her) suggestively. A few minutes later, both Paul and Marcy are naked. Marcy throws Paul down on to the bed forcefully and begins to ride him.
Paul: You don't use condoms?
Marcy: Don't worry, I'm healthy.

View Quote The visiting out-of-town college students have just found a jar of fox piss on the shelves of eccentric Old Man Cadwell's shop.
Old Man Cadwell: Oh Lord, don't drop that! If you do, that's powerful stuff! All the foxes around would come down here, you'd have friends like you'd never had before.

View Quote While washing her face in the bathroom, Marcy discovers a suspicious pair of sores on her back where Paul had been grabbing her when they had sex.
Marcy: Jesus, Paul, you really did a number on my back!