Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas quotes
12 total quotes
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Car Salesman: Listen. You fellows haven't been drinking? Have you?
Duke: No. Not me. We're responsible people. [Drives away with screeching tyres]
Car Salesman: Goddamn it! You got my pen! Goddamn hippies!
Duke: No. Not me. We're responsible people. [Drives away with screeching tyres]
Car Salesman: Goddamn it! You got my pen! Goddamn hippies!
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Duke: Hey, there's two women ****ing a polar bear.
Dr. Gonzo: Don't tell me those things. Not now, man.
Dr. Gonzo: Don't tell me those things. Not now, man.
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Duke: Let's cut down to the brass tacks here... How much for the ape?
Ape's Owner: How much you got?
Ape's Owner: How much you got?
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Gonzo: AHH! Medicine, medicine!
Duke: Huh? Oh, medicine! Watch out, this man has a bad heart, angina pectoris, but don't worry we have a cure. (cracks open an amyl) Ok, big wiff, big wiff, sunny boy! [Gonzo inhales the amyl] Much better...
Duke: Ahh, now for the doctor [he inhales the amyl]... eeeeeeeee... Ahh!
[Pause]
Gonzo : What the-? What the **** are we doin out here in the middle of the desert? Somebody call the police, we need help, we need help, we need help [Slams the horn] Ah ha, ah ha, ah haha!
Duke: Huh? Oh, medicine! Watch out, this man has a bad heart, angina pectoris, but don't worry we have a cure. (cracks open an amyl) Ok, big wiff, big wiff, sunny boy! [Gonzo inhales the amyl] Much better...
Duke: Ahh, now for the doctor [he inhales the amyl]... eeeeeeeee... Ahh!
[Pause]
Gonzo : What the-? What the **** are we doin out here in the middle of the desert? Somebody call the police, we need help, we need help, we need help [Slams the horn] Ah ha, ah ha, ah haha!
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Gonzo: We won't make the nut unless we have unlimited credit.
Duke: Jesus Christ, we will, man. You Samoans are all the same. You have no faith in the essential decency of the white man's culture.
Duke: Jesus Christ, we will, man. You Samoans are all the same. You have no faith in the essential decency of the white man's culture.
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Gonzo: [After cocaine blows away in the wind] Did you see what GOD just did to us man!
Duke: God didn't do that, you did! You're a ****ing narcotics agent, I knew it. That was our cocaine you ****ing pig, s**** [swats at him with fly swatter] Pig, swine, whore!
Gonzo: [Pointing (previously shown to be empty) gun at Duke] Better be careful. Plenty of vultures out here, they'll pick your bones clean by morning.
Duke: You ****ing whore...
Gonzo: (holding up some acid) He he heeee, here's your half of the sunshine acid. Eat it.
Duke: Yeah, all right sure. How long do I have?
Gonzo: As your attorney I advise you to drive at top speed and it'll be a Goddamn miracle if we get there before you turn into some kind of wild animal. Are you ready for that? Checking into a Las Vegas hotel under a phony name with the intent to commit capital fraud on a head full of acid? I sure hope so...
Duke: God didn't do that, you did! You're a ****ing narcotics agent, I knew it. That was our cocaine you ****ing pig, s**** [swats at him with fly swatter] Pig, swine, whore!
Gonzo: [Pointing (previously shown to be empty) gun at Duke] Better be careful. Plenty of vultures out here, they'll pick your bones clean by morning.
Duke: You ****ing whore...
Gonzo: (holding up some acid) He he heeee, here's your half of the sunshine acid. Eat it.
Duke: Yeah, all right sure. How long do I have?
Gonzo: As your attorney I advise you to drive at top speed and it'll be a Goddamn miracle if we get there before you turn into some kind of wild animal. Are you ready for that? Checking into a Las Vegas hotel under a phony name with the intent to commit capital fraud on a head full of acid? I sure hope so...
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Narrator: The name rang a bell, but I couldn't concentrate. Terrible things were happening all around us. [sees the floor get flooded with blood]
Duke: Put on some golf shoes! Otherwise we'll never make it out of this place alive. Impossible to walk in this muck. No footing at all!
Duke: Put on some golf shoes! Otherwise we'll never make it out of this place alive. Impossible to walk in this muck. No footing at all!
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Narrator: We were somewhere around Barstow, on the edge of the desert, when the drugs began to take hold. I remember saying something like:
Raoul Duke: I feel a bit lightheaded. Maybe you should drive.
Narrator: Suddenly, there was a terrible roar all around us, and the sky was full with what looked like huge bats, all swooping and screeching and diving around the car, and a voice was screaming:
Narrator and Raoul Duke (simultaneously): Holy Jesus! What are these goddamn animals?!
Dr. Gonzo: Did you say something?
Raoul Duke: Hm? Never mind. It's your turn to drive.
Narrator: No point in mentioning these bats, I thought. Poor bastard will see them soon enough.
Raoul Duke: I feel a bit lightheaded. Maybe you should drive.
Narrator: Suddenly, there was a terrible roar all around us, and the sky was full with what looked like huge bats, all swooping and screeching and diving around the car, and a voice was screaming:
Narrator and Raoul Duke (simultaneously): Holy Jesus! What are these goddamn animals?!
Dr. Gonzo: Did you say something?
Raoul Duke: Hm? Never mind. It's your turn to drive.
Narrator: No point in mentioning these bats, I thought. Poor bastard will see them soon enough.
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[driving past a hitch-hiker in the middle of the desert]
Gonzo: Let's give that boy a ride!
Duke: What? No! We can't stop here! This is bat country!
Gonzo: Let's give that boy a ride!
Duke: What? No! We can't stop here! This is bat country!
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[Duke and Gonzo are covering the DA'S convention on marijuana, with keynote speaker L. Ron Bumquist]
L. Ron Bumquist: The easiest way to do this is for each of us to try to imagine what is going on inside the possessed mind of a drug addict. [holds up a joint] The dope fiend refers to the butt of a marijuana cigarette as a "roach". He does so because it resembles a ****roach.
Gonzo: What the **** these people are talking about? You gotta be crazy on acid to think a joint looks like a goddamn ****roach.
Bumquist: You will notice that I have distinguished four distinct types of being in the cannabis and marijuana society. They are "cool", "groovy", "hip" and "square". Seldom, if ever, does one aspire to be "square".
Gonzo: This is a ****ing nightmare, man.
Bumquist: If he can figure out what is "happening", he can rise one notch to become "hip", and if he can convince himself to approve of what is "happening", he can become "groovy". [ominously] Groovy! And then he raise himself to the rank of "cool". He can become one of those... "cool guys".
D.A.: Dr. Bumquist, do you think the anthropologist Margaret Mead's strange behavior of late can be explained by a private marijuana addiction?
Duke: Good question!
Bumquist: I'm not really sure I can answer that. But what I can tell you is that if Margaret Mead, at her age, smoked grass...she'd have one hell of a trip! [laughs hysterically; the seated DA's follow suit]
L. Ron Bumquist: The easiest way to do this is for each of us to try to imagine what is going on inside the possessed mind of a drug addict. [holds up a joint] The dope fiend refers to the butt of a marijuana cigarette as a "roach". He does so because it resembles a ****roach.
Gonzo: What the **** these people are talking about? You gotta be crazy on acid to think a joint looks like a goddamn ****roach.
Bumquist: You will notice that I have distinguished four distinct types of being in the cannabis and marijuana society. They are "cool", "groovy", "hip" and "square". Seldom, if ever, does one aspire to be "square".
Gonzo: This is a ****ing nightmare, man.
Bumquist: If he can figure out what is "happening", he can rise one notch to become "hip", and if he can convince himself to approve of what is "happening", he can become "groovy". [ominously] Groovy! And then he raise himself to the rank of "cool". He can become one of those... "cool guys".
D.A.: Dr. Bumquist, do you think the anthropologist Margaret Mead's strange behavior of late can be explained by a private marijuana addiction?
Duke: Good question!
Bumquist: I'm not really sure I can answer that. But what I can tell you is that if Margaret Mead, at her age, smoked grass...she'd have one hell of a trip! [laughs hysterically; the seated DA's follow suit]
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[Duke and Gonzo have just picked up a hitch-hiker]
Duke: There's one thing you should probably understand. CAN YOU HEAR ME? GOOD! I want you to have all the background. [gets in the backseat] This is a very ominous assignment - with overtones of extreme personal danger. I'm a Doctor of Journalism, man! This is important, goddamnit! This is a true story!...
[Gonzo panics and swerves the car]
Gonzo: DON'T TOUCH MY ****ING NECK!
Narrator: Our vibrations were getting nasty. But why? Was there no communication in this car? Had we deteriorated to the level of dumb beasts?
[Duke puts an arm around the hitch-hiker]
Duke: I want you to understand that this man at the wheel is my attorney. He's not just some dingbat I found on the strip, man. He's a foreigner. I think he's probably Samoan. But doesn't matter though, does it? Are you prejudiced?
Hitchhiker: Hell no.
Duke: I didn't think so. Because in spite of his race, this man is extremely valuable to me. Oh shit! I forgot about the beer! You want some?
Hitchhiker: No.
Duke: How 'bout some ether?
Hitchhiker: What?
Duke: Nevermind. Alright, let's get right to the heart of this thing.
Duke: There's one thing you should probably understand. CAN YOU HEAR ME? GOOD! I want you to have all the background. [gets in the backseat] This is a very ominous assignment - with overtones of extreme personal danger. I'm a Doctor of Journalism, man! This is important, goddamnit! This is a true story!...
[Gonzo panics and swerves the car]
Gonzo: DON'T TOUCH MY ****ING NECK!
Narrator: Our vibrations were getting nasty. But why? Was there no communication in this car? Had we deteriorated to the level of dumb beasts?
[Duke puts an arm around the hitch-hiker]
Duke: I want you to understand that this man at the wheel is my attorney. He's not just some dingbat I found on the strip, man. He's a foreigner. I think he's probably Samoan. But doesn't matter though, does it? Are you prejudiced?
Hitchhiker: Hell no.
Duke: I didn't think so. Because in spite of his race, this man is extremely valuable to me. Oh shit! I forgot about the beer! You want some?
Hitchhiker: No.
Duke: How 'bout some ether?
Hitchhiker: What?
Duke: Nevermind. Alright, let's get right to the heart of this thing.