Herbie Rides Again quotes

View Quote Secretary: I'm sorry, Mr. Hawk. I called the motel, but they said your nephew checked out.
Alonzo Hawk: What do you mean he's checked out? When? Where? Who told him he could check out? How dare he disappear when he knows I'm worried sick? I'll tear his chicken-livered gizzard to pieces! I'll stomp him silly! I'll take this letter knife, and I'll stab that kid right in his ungrateful breastbone! You know me Millicent, normally I'm a kindly, fun-loving fellow! But when I get crossed...I go bananas.

View Quote Waiter: The giant lobster is very good tonight, sir. Uh, of course. No lobster.

View Quote Willboughy: Good morning, Miss Millicent.
Secretary: Good morning.
Willboughy: MRS. STEINMETZ!
Secretary: I told you Mr. Hawk was busy!

View Quote Willoughby Whitfield: Don't worry, Uncle! Everything's under control.
Alonzo Hawk: That's just dandy! [Tosses an ashtray towards Willoughby but accidentally hits Herbie instead, who immediately starts revving up]
Grandma Steinmetz: Now you've done it, Mr. Hawk! You've made Herbie very angry!

View Quote Willoughby Whitfield: [rehearsing to his hotel room mirror while putting make-up on] Uncle Alonzo, I've dropped by to talk to you man to man, so I can look you squarely in the eye. No, I'm wearing make-up because of a black eye. A girl hit me in the face with a broiled lobster the moment I mentioned your name. This same wonderful, intelligent, clear-sighted girl was able to convince me what kind of a person you really are. I do not hold with your scheme of cheating Mrs. Steinmetz out of her home so that you may build your concrete anthill on the spot where she has known so much happiness. Hm. I think you are despicable, greedy, grasping, and wholly without principle or pity. [pause] I also believe you are not a nice person. I am going back to Missouri now, so that you may no longer use me as a cat's paw! I bid you farewell, more in sorrow than in anger. Please do not send us any more fruit for Christmas.

View Quote Willoughby Whitfield: Miss Haris, let's stop kidding ourselves, okay? This is just an ordinary little car. Like a million other ordinary, rather unattractive...
[Herbie takes off down the road]
Nicole Harris: I don't think you should've said that. Herbie's very sensitive about his appearance!

View Quote Willoughby Whitfield: Please do not send us any more fruit for Christmas.

View Quote Willoughby Whitfield: Please, Miss Harris, I can't believe Uncle Alonzo would do things like that.
Nicole Harris: Wait a minute! Uncle? He's your uncle?
Willoughby Whitfield: Yes. That's what I've been trying to tell...
Nicole Harris: You rotten spy!
<She slaps him in the face with a broiled lobster, and he falls into the water.>

View Quote Willoughby Whitfield: We understand your position, Mrs. Steinmetz. That's why Mr. Hawk has authorized...
Grandma Steinmetz: Don't tell me you're from Alonzo Hawk?!
Willoughby Whitfield: Yes.
Grandma Steinmetz: Oh, and you have such a nice face. Not at all like those ruffians he usually sends around!
Willoughby Whitfield: But if you'll just look at the size of this check, Mrs. Steinmetz...
Grandma Steinmetz: I don't know anything about money! My nephew, Tennessee Steinmetz usually takes care of me. He used to live here. But he had to rush off to Tibet because his guru got sick!

View Quote Willoughby Whitford: Miss Harris, come on. You're obviously an intelligent young woman. Why do you pretend to talk to this little car like that? Some people might wonder.
Nicole Harris: Don't listen to him, Herbie. Just move it.

View Quote Willoughby: Well, your things aren't here. Maybe we should...
<The orchestrion hears Willoughby's voice and grabs the attention of the trio by playing "Pomp and Cir****stance." The three rush to a curtain, which Willougby pulls off, revealing the trolley car and all of Mrs. Steinmetz's possessions. Mrs. Steinmetz walks over to the painting, but the guards Hawk called in catch her.>
Guard 1: ALL RIGHT, HOLD IT! <The trio turn around.> Okay, get your hands up!
<The orchestrion plays another song as Willoughby and Nicole raise their hands, but Mrs. Steinmetz does not. Herbie decides to help by driving to a different part of the warehouse.>

View Quote <The trio are at Alonzo Hawk Van & Storage. Willoughby is trying to pick a lock.>
Nicole: What's the matter? Haven't you ever jimmied a lock before?
Willoughby: Well, it isn't exactly a hobby of mine.
Nicole: Well, hurry! We can't just stand here...
<Herbie's horn honks, and the trio run out of the way as the car charges forward and smashes the door down.>
Mrs. Steinmetz: Good for Herbie!
<The three run inside, but stop when they hear a recording.>
Hawk's voice: "HALT! YOU HAVE BEEN DETECTED BY ELECTRONIC SURVEILLANCE. YOU ARE ABOUT TO BE SURROUNDED BY AGENTS OF THE ALONZO HAWK SECURITY SERVICE! TOUCH NOTHING IN THIS WAREHOUSE OR YOU WILL BE PROSECUTED TO THE FULL EXTENT OF THE LAW!"
Mrs. Steinmetz: Don't you dare talk to me like that, Mr. Hawk! I want my things back, and I'm going to have them!
Willoughby: Uh, I think that's a recording.
Mrs. Steinmetz: I don't care what it is!
<The recording plays again.>
Willoughby: Come on; let's find your things before somebody gets here.

View Quote [Herbie has just made it impossible for the guards to escape.]
Smitty: Hey; we're cut off! How are we going to get out of here?
Guard 2: You know, Smitty, I don't think Mr. Hawk's going to be happy about this.