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[The doorbell rings; Bilbo goes to answer it and finds a dwarf.]
Dwalin: [Bows] Dwalin, at your service.
Bilbo: Uh, Bilbo...Baggins. At yours. [Dwalin walks in] Do we know each other?
Dwalin: No. Which way, laddie? Is it down here?
Bilbo: Is what down where?
Dwalin: Supper. He said there'd be food and lots of it.
Bilbo: He said? Who said?
[Dwalin proceeds to the kitchen and eats Bilbo's dinner]
Dwalin: Very good, this. Any more?
Bilbo: What? Oh, uh, yes, yes. [finds a jar of seed-cakes] Help yourself. [pauses as Dwalin eats away] It's just that, um, I wasn't expecting company.
[The doorbell rings]
Dwalin: That'll be the door.
[Bilbo opens the door, the dwarf smiles and bows]
Balin: Balin, At your service.
Bilbo: [blankly] Good evening.
Balin: Yes, it is. Though I think it might rain later. Am I late?
Bilbo: Late for what?
Balin: [catches Dwalin trying to get more scones out of another jar] OH! Evening, brother!
Dwalin: [sets down the jar and smiles] Ho ho, by my beard! You are shorter and wider than last we met.
Balin: Wider, not shorter. Sharp enough for both of us.
[Dwalin and Balin laugh and butt heads. They proceed to raid Bilbo's pantry while talking with each other]
Bilbo: Excuse me? Sorry, I hate to interrupt, but the thing is I'm not entirely sure you're in the right house. It's not that I don't like visitors. I-I like visitors as much as the next hobbit, but I do like to know them before they come visiting. The thing is...uh...the thing is, I don't know either of you, not in the slightest. I don't mean to be blunt, but I had to speak my mind. I'm sorry.
Balin: [suddenly noticing that Bilbo was talking] Apology accepted. [smiles, to Bilbo's growing confusion]


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