Fear? Perhaps, Miss Ross. And loneliness, too. Yes... I feel them both. But I have lived... completely once. I was so much in love, and she so much wanted a baby. My baby. I could tell from the moment she conceived that it wasn't a son I had given her but something else. A monster, maybe. I should have put a stop to it right then, but I was curious and that was my downfall. And as I watched this tiny life unfold, I began to imagine the horror of it and my curiosity was replaced with compassion. But they took away my chance to cure him. Your father threw me out. I remember that day so well, every moment, every sensation, walking into the house, the feeling of the handle of the knife in my hand. I knew I was doing a father's work, fulfilling a father's mercy. But then, she surprised me. It was as if she and the knife merged. You cannot imagine the unbearable finality of it. And in that one moment, I took everything that was dear to me and transformed it into nothing more than a memory.
Fear? Perhaps, Miss Ross. And loneliness, too. Yes... I feel them both. But I have lived... completely once. I was so much in love, and she so much wanted a baby. My baby. I could tell from the moment she conceived that it wasn't a son I had given her but something else. A monster, maybe. I should have put a stop to it right then, but I was curious and that was my downfall. And as I watched this tiny life unfold, I began to imagine the horror of it and my curiosity was replaced with compassion. But they took away my chance to cure him. Your father threw me out. I remember that day so well, every moment, every sensation, walking into the house, the feeling of the handle of the knife in my hand. I knew I was doing a father's work, fulfilling a father's mercy. But then, she surprised me. It was as if she and the knife merged. You cannot imagine the unbearable finality of it. And in that one moment, I took everything that was dear to me and transformed it into nothing more than a memory.
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