Little Giants quotes

View Quote Cowboys: [Chanting before the game] Cowboys! Cowboys! Win, win, win!
Little Giants: [Chanting before the game] Giants! Giants!
Jake "Berminator" Berman: [Yelling and chanting] Help us, God!

View Quote Danny O'Shea: [Disguising his voice as an old lady] State police? Oh, thank God! My name is Thelma Mae Rogers. I'm 86 years old. I live in Urbania. There are two men down the bridge from the Shell station spying on some kids! [Passes the phone to Timmy, who feign cries] We're all really scared. I just don't think it's right for men their age to be parading around in their underwear!
Timmy Moore: Please hurry!
Danny O'Shea: Oh, no! [Hangs up the phone] Nice job. [High fives Timmy]

View Quote Danny O'Shea: [When the Little Giants, losing at the half, want to be put on the injured list] You know, there is something you guys should know. When I was 10 years old, I put myself on the injured list. I never got off it.
Timmy "Rawhide" Moore: Why?
Danny O'Shea: Because I didn't get picked a few times, so I started hiding under the bleachers.
Marcus "The Toe": That's where we belong. Under the bleachers.
Danny O'Shea: No, you don't. You guys belong out there with those Cowboys. You know how I know that? Because I belong out there with my brother.
Rudy Zolteck: Give us a break, coach. You could never beat Kevin O'Shea at anything!
Danny O'Shea: That's not true. I did beat him once.
Jake "Berminator" Berman: When?
Danny O'Shea: When we were kids. We used to race our bikes down Cherry Hill every day after school. We raced every day and he always beat me, but one time - one time i beat him.
Jake "Berminator" Berman:: You beat Kevin down Cherry Hill?
Danny O'Shea: Yes, I did. He ate my dust.
Johnny "Viper" Vennaro: Big deal. One time.
Tad "Rad Tad" Simpson: You know, one time at Randy Cooper's swim party, I did a backflip off the high dive, and my brother chickened out.
Marcus "The Toe": Roger chickened out? He's a Marine!
Rudy Zolteck: Ah, that's nothing! One time at the spring carnival, I beat both of my brothers in the Cow Dung Toss.
Tad "Rad Tad" Simpson: You beat Matt and Brad in the turd toss?
Jake "Berminator" Berman: You know, one time I went fishing with my entire family, and I was the only one that didn't throw up.
Marcus "The Toe": So what? It still doesn't make us good football players.
Danny O'Shea: Well, wait a second, guys. Who said you had to be good to play football? You play football because you want to. You play football because it's fun. You play football so you and pretend you're Joe Montana throwing a touchdown pass, or Emmitt Smith going for a long run, and even if those Cowboys are better than you guys, even if they beat you 99 times out of 100, that still leaves.
Tad "Rad Tad" Simpson: One time.
Rudy Zolteck: One time.
Junior Floyd: [Smiles] Yeah...one time!

View Quote Danny O'Shea: This whole town may love you, but I'm the only one who knows how truly sick you are!
Kevin O'Shea: I treated you like a prince!
Danny O'Shea: You ignored me!
Kevin O'Shea: I took you to see the Cleveland Indians!
Danny O'Shea: You left me at the stadium!
Kevin O'Shea: Ahh!

View Quote Jake "Berminator" Berman: [Referring to the antacid tablets] I use these for acid indigestion.
Fast Eddie: What are we going to use them for?
Jake: Intimidation.

View Quote Jake "Berminator" Berman: [Repeated line] I can't see with this thing on!

View Quote Jake "Berminator" Berman: [To Danny after arriving overly protected] My mom says the pads you gave me weren't enough. [The team comes over and plays pushes with him] This is great! Keep pushing! I can't feel a thi- [Smacks into a pole and falls down]
Little Giants: Jake? Jake? Are you all right?

View Quote Kevin O'Shea: [Upon discovering a peanut butter and jelly sandwich inside of Rudy's helmet] Peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Are you nuts?
Rudy Zolteck: [Takes a bite] It's still good!
Kevin O'Shea: You'll never get anywhere treating your helmet like a lunchbox, son. [Sees Butz pull something else out of the helmet] What are those?
Butz: Cheetos.
Kevin O'Shea: Crunchy or Puffed?
Butz: Puffed.
Kevin O'Shea: [Under his breath] Whimp.

View Quote Mike Hammersmith: [Upon seeing Becky emerge from the locker room dressed up in Giant gear] Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa. What's that cheerleader doing with a helmet on?
Kevin O'Shea: That's no cheerleader. That's my niece, Becky. She's pissed.

View Quote Rasheed "Hot Hands" Hanon: [Talking to his hands after failing to catch the football] Why do you do this to me, fellas? I cut your nails, wash you, put gloves on you when you're cold.

View Quote Rudy Zolteck: [As the Little Giants are changing, a woman arrives with her son] Aahh! It's a mom!
[The Little Giants scream and run away to hide]

View Quote Rudy Zolteck: [Repeated line] You rang?

View Quote Rudy Zolteck: We never get picked for anything. Life stinks!
Rasheed "Hot Hands" Hanon: Yeah, there goes my shot at the pros. I'm gonna have to be a senator.
Rudy Zolteck: Here's a kiss for Murphy. And for Patterson and Briggs too. [Farts loudly]
Tad "Rad Tad" Simpson: [Laughing]
Rasheed "Hot Hands" Hanon: [Laughing while waving his hand] Whoo! Whoo!
Murphy: [Enters with Briggs and Patterson] UGH! Damn, Zol-fart! What kind of roadkill did your mom feed you last night?
Rudy Zolteck: Free-range skunk.

View Quote Sean Murphy: [As the Cowboys have possession of the ball; to Rudy] Get ready dog breath. Because when I'm finished with you, you'll be farting out of your mouth and talking out of your butt!
Rudy Zolteck: [To "Rad Tad"] Is that physically possible?
[The Cowboys hike the ball and Spike gains enough yards for a first down; during the play, Murphy sends Rudy flying and landing on his face; After the play, the Little Giants check on Rudy, who's still down] Tad "Rad Tad" Simpson: Are you all right?
Rudy Zolteck: [Talking out of his butt] I think so.
Tad "Rad Tad" Simpson: [Impressed] Huh! I guess it is possible.

View Quote Sean Murphy: [To Jake] Hey, four eyes!
[Pokes him] Jake "Berminator" Berman: Ow!
Sean Murphy: Want your mama? [He laughs and walks away]
Jake "Berminator" Berman: Don't be talkin' bout my mama!