Looney Tunes: Back in Action quotes

View Quote ACME Chairman: [to a miserable Wile E. Coyote] My God, young man, what am I going to do with you?! You've done nothing but screw up! You've walked off of mesas! You've been smashed by boulders! You've been run over by diesel trucks! And don't blame the equipment! The equipment is good; it's ACME equipment. You're a coyote! Be wily! [calms down] All right, now...buck up and let's see a little smile.
[Wile E. smiles, briefly and unenthusiastically]
ACME Chairman: Little bigger.
[Wile E. gives a bigger one, this time holding it]
ACME Chairman: Little bigger.
[Wile E.'s smile spreads to a disproportionate size]
ACME Chairman: Oh, that's nice. Now, just go take a shower, and don't come back till you smell better!
[Wile E., now cheered up, heads upstairs]
ACME Chairman: [calling to him] But be careful! There's some men moving a safe up there, and I don't want you to--
[A cartoonish jet-engine, followed by a "crash" sound, is heard]
ACME Chairman: [pause] And be careful of the box of fireworks, because--
[Released fireworks are heard]
ACME Chairman: [pause] I suppose I should mention the plate-glass window--
[Shattering glass is heard]
ACME Chairman: [pause] It's tough being the boss.

View Quote D.J.: There's a man there! He's got a woman! She's tied up in a burlap sack and he's taking her to the Eiffel Tower!
Pepe: Ah, eet eez Spring, eez eet not?

View Quote Foghorn Leghorn: (to D.J.) Card, sir?
D.J.: Hit me.
Foghorn Leghorn: Don't-- I say, don't 'cha wanna look at your cards first, son? Boy's 'bout as sharp as a bowlin' ball.
[Daffy and D.J. finally escape the Wooden Nickel]
Daffy: I say we do Cirque de Soleil and call it a night.
[D.J. makes a mad dash for his car]
Daffy: How 'bout the Liberace Museum?

View Quote [After Elmer Fudd leaps out of La Grande Jatte (by pointillist Georges Seurat), Bugs reads to him from a museum guide.]
Bugs: Pointillism. A technique using individual dots of pigment, which, taken together... [whips out a pocket electric fan] ...make an image. [turns on the fan.]
Elmer: Aw, crud! [Elmer's dots start to disperse, until only his shoes are left.]
Bugs (to audience): I think, when you go to the movies, you should learn somethin'.
[Daffy is busy redrawing himself.]

View Quote [As Granny's elephant progresses through the jungle, a flock of multicolored Tweety birds fly around]
Tweety: I've discovered my woots!
Sylvester: I've discovered my lunch!
[The birds attack Sylvester. Cut to Tweety, in African garb]
Tweety: Cry freedom!

View Quote [At the Louvre, as Daffy grabs the playing-card lens, Elmer Fudd jams his shotgun into the back of Daffy's head.]
Elmer: I'll take that!
Bugs: Em, what gives, Doc? We made thoity-five pictures together.
Elmer: Well, as it tuwns out, I'm secwetwy evil.
Daffy: [snorts] That's showbiz for ya!
Elmer: Now, make with the card, so I can pwease my dark masters!

View Quote [At the Wooden Nickel, diva Dusty Tails changes while she talks about her career.]
Dusty: I also work for the Agency. Professional assassin. It's really hard for me to juggle the two sometimes. I don't know what I'm gonna do when I have kids!
[She comes out wearing a shiny black-leather catsuit.]
Dusty: Do you know how hard it is to find a nanny with advanced weapons training?
Daffy: [gives a wolf-whistle] How many galoshes died to make that little number?

View Quote [Bugs and Daffy enter the Persistence of Memory painting to evade Elmer Fudd. Elmer follows, enters, and takes aim, until his gun melts, remaining true to the theme of the painting. Bugs and Daffy laugh at him and run off, but they too start melting; their voices are slow and toned to a low key]
Daffy: Well, this is surreal.
Elmer: [Producing icons that represent each word he says] Stop, or I'll fire! [Attempts to take aim again]
Bugs and Daffy: Yipe!
[Elmer fires, but the bullets are only propelled a few inches away. Elmer starts to melt completely out of shape. Bugs and Daffy make their way to the next painting through the wallpaper]

View Quote [D.J. and Daffy Duck drive to Las Vegas.]
D.J.: I'm not a security guard! For your information, it's just a job. It's what I do for money.
Daffy: Um-hmm.
D.J.: What I really do is... I'm... I'm a... I'm a stuntman.
Daffy: Hah! You, a stuntman? Please!
D.J.: I am! Did you see those Mummy movies? I'm in them more than Brendan Fraser is.
[Daffy rolls his eyes, complete with cartoon sound effect]
D.J.: Oh, no, you couldn't stand that! One day, he decides to say, "No-no-no! The Bren-Master does all his own stunts"!

View Quote [D.J. tries to take the Mona Lisa Queen of Diamonds playing card from Dusty, who instead slips it inside her outfit]
Dusty: That is so sweet! You, trying to take over for your father. These evil forces, they're bad people!
Daffy: Relax, sister! I don't know the meaning of the word "fear"!
[Daffy opens the door and finds himself facing a lit cannon.]
Yosemite Sam: Say your prayers, Duck!
Daffy: "Fear: Noun. A state of terror". Aaaah!

View Quote [D.J., Kate, Bugs, and Daffy approach a dead end]
Bugs: Eh, just a suggestion, but all those in favor of not hittin' that wall, say "aye".
D.J. and Kate: AYE!!!
Daffy: Mother!
Spy car computer: Taking you to Mother!
[the car takes to the sky before it can hit the wall]

View Quote [Driving alongside the good guys, Nasty Canasta lights a stick of dynamite to throw into their car.]
Kate: Dynamite?! Who has dynamite?!
Daffy: [scoffs] Welcome to my world.

View Quote [From behind, we see the elephant come upon a picturesque lost city in the jungle.]
Daffy: What a fantastic view!
Bugs: Unless you're in the audience, in which case you've been staring at an elephant's behind for thoity seconds.

View Quote [In the desert, D.J. spots a Wal-Mart store, rippling in the heat]
D.J.: Hey, look at that!
Bugs: Is it a mirage, or just product placement?
Daffy: Who cares? With shopping convenience at such low prices!
[Daffy runs toward the image.]
Daffy: Water! Fresca! Mountain Dew! Your product name here! Woo-hoo-hoo!
DJ: [to Kate] Is this your idea?
[She opens her mouth to object, then gets defensive.]
Kate: The audience expects it. They don't even notice this kind of thing anymore.
[D.J. shares his disappointed look with the audience; later, the intrepid adventurers depart the desert Wal-Mart with beverages]
Bugs: Nice of Wal-Mart to provide these Wal-Mart beverages in retoin for us saying "Wal-Mart" so many times.

View Quote [Inside the Area 52 lab, chief spy-scientist Mother talks to the DJ et al.]
Mother: This isn't about the giant ants, is it?
Kate: Giant... ants?
Mother: 'Cause they're not really ants... anymore.
[Mother drinks from a flask of blue liquid.]
D.J.: Tell me about the Blue Monkey.
[She spews her beverage on D.J.]
Mother: How do you know about that thing that I've never heard of in my entire life?
D.J.: My dad told me.
Mother: What is the point of making them pinky-swear?!