Frank Detorri quotes

View Quote Honey, the reason that monkeys eat so many fruits and vegetables is because they're not smart enough to butcher a cow. Your mother - God bless her soul - she didn't believe the old-fashioned ideas about nursing and breast-feeding and all that. Uh-uh, you were fed cheeseburgers as a baby, and look at you - you're as big as a house, you're as strong as a bull, you smell like a cow. Your cholesterol's probably a little high, but they have medicine for that now. You can get an angioplasty, get it all cleared out.

View Quote [sees monkeys scratching their behinds] Oh, come on, hey, hey, hey! Show some class will ya? We got mixed company down here. [scratches his own behind]

View Quote Is beer fluid?