Pillow Talk quotes

View Quote Brad: [on the phone pretending to be Rex] Am I gonna see you tonight?
Jan: I'd love to Rex, but I already have a date.
Brad: Who with?
Jan: A client. You don't know him. Jonathan Forbes.
Brad: Of course, you're not the kind of girl who would break a date.
Jan: No I'm not.
Brad: And I ain't the kinda guy who'd ask you to.
Jan: I know you're not.
Brad: I'll pick you up at 8.
Jan: I'll be ready.

View Quote Brad: Look, I don't know what's bothering you, but don't take your bedroom problems out on me.
Jan: I have no bedroom problems. There's nothing in my bedroom that bothers me.
Brad: Oh-h-h-h. That's too bad.

View Quote Brad: Why don't you take her over for the rest of the evening?
Jonathan: Me?
Brad: Yeah! Take her dancing maybe. She's dying to learn how to dance.
Jonathan: Wait wait. She doesn't know how to dance?
Brad: Well naturally, she doesn't get out of the house very often.
Jonathan: What do you mean, "naturally"?
Brad: Jonathan, believe me, you and Moose - I mean Miss Taggett will get along...
Jonathan: "Moose"?
Brad: So what the girl picks up a nickname? You know, how cruel kids can be. Especially, when someone is a little different.
Jonathan: Different? How different?
Brad: Well... You know. [hesitatingly points to face] Just different.
Jonathan: [Pointing to a fat lady sitting at a table] That couldn't be her, could it?
Brad: How can you tell?
[waves at the lady, who waves back]
Brad: See, she's so friendly. C'mon.
Jonathan: Oh no! Its your moose. Happy Hunting!
[Jonathan leaves]
Brad: Yes, indeed.

View Quote Jan: [about living alone] Well, what am I missing?
Alma: If you have to ask, you're missing it!

View Quote Jan: Officer, arrest this man - he's taking me up to his apartment!
Police Officer: Well, I can't say that I blame him, miss.

View Quote Jonathan: Brad, she is the sweetest, she is the loveliest, she is the most talented woman I have ever met.
Brad: That's what you said when you married that stripper.
Jonathan: She wasn't a stripper. She was an exotic dancer... with trained doves.

View Quote [Jan and Brad are on the phone discussing a phone schedule]
Jan: We'll just have to try living with each other...
[Jan pauses, waiting for a response]
Brad: Well?
Jan: I was waiting for you to make some off-color remark.
Brad: Miss Morrow, is that all you have on your mind?
Jan: Never mind my mind! You just stick to your half-hour and I'll stick to mine!

View Quote At least my problems can be solved in one bedroom. You couldn't solve yours in a thousand!

View Quote Can you believe that? They sent a woman. That's like sending a marshmallow to put out a bonfire.

View Quote I'm yours tonight. My darling possess me.

View Quote I've had hangovers before, but this time, even my hair hurts.

View Quote If there's anything worse than a woman living alone, it's a woman saying she likes it.

View Quote If you'll excuse me, I better go to the powder moon. I mean room. Fix my lipstick.

View Quote Mr. Allen, this may come as a surprise to you, but there are some men who don't end every sentence with a proposition.

View Quote Why did I spend a fortune having this apartment done over? Why did I cut myself off from every girl I know? Why does any man destroy himself? Because he thinks he's getting married!