Ratatouille quotes

View Quote Linguini: Can I interest you in a dessert this evening?
Ego: Don't you always?
Linguini: Which one would you like?
Ego: [to R?my, who is looking through the kitchen door window] Surprise me!

View Quote Linguini: Listen, I just want you to know how honored I am to be studying under such a--
Colette: [suddenly pins Linguini's sleeve to the cutting board with a knife] No, you listen! I just want you'to know exactly who you are dealing with! How many women do you see in this kitchen?
Linguini: Well, I uh--
Colette: [Sticks a second knife to his sleeve] Only me. Why do you think that is? Because haute cuisine is an antiquated hierarchy built upon rules written by stupid, old men. Rules designed to make it impossible for women to enter this world, but still I'm here. How did this happen?
Linguini: Well because you, because you--
Colette: [Sticks a third knife to his sleeve] Because I am the toughest cook in this kitchen! I have worked too hard for too long to get here, and I am not going to jeopardize it for some garbage boy who got lucky! Got it?
Linguini: [Nervously] Uh-huh.
[Colette removes the knives pinning Linguini's arm down, causing him to fall to the ground]
Linguini: [Gets up, laughs hysterically] Wow!

View Quote Linguini: When I added that extra ingredient instead of following the recipe like you said, that wasn't me...either.
Colette: What do you mean?
Linguini: I mean, I wouldn't have done that. I would've followed the recipe, I would've followed your advice. I would've followed your advice 'til the ends of the Earth because I love your-r-r-r advice. But--
R?my: [In Linguini's toque, to self] Don't do it...
Linguini: [hesitantly] I have a secret. It's sort of disturbing. I have a ra--I have a ra-a-a-a--
Colette: You have a rash?
Linguini: No, no, no. I have this-this tiny, uh, little, little--[rapidly] a-tiny-chef-who-tells-me-what-to-do.

View Quote Linguini: You're Anton Ego.
Ego: You're slow for someone in the fast lane.
Linguini: And you're thin for someone who likes food!
Ego: I don't like food, I love it. If I don't love it, I don't swallow.

View Quote Mustafa: Do you know what you would like this evening, sir?
Ego: Yes, I think I do. After hearing a lot of over-heated puffery about your new cook, do you know what I'm craving? A little... perspective. That's it. I'd like some fresh, clear, well-seasoned perspective. Can you suggest a good wine to go with that?
Mustafa: With what, sir?
Ego: Perspective, fresh out, I take it?
[Mustafa is confused and stays silent]
Ego: Very well. Since you are all out of perspective and no one else seems to have it in this bloody town, I'll make you a deal: you provide the food, I'll provide the perspective, which would go nicely with a bottle of Cheval Blanc 1947.
Mustafa: I'm afraid...um...your dinner selection?
Ego: [bursts out of his chair and gets right in Mustafa's face] Tell your chef, Linguini, that I want whatever what he dares to serve me! Tell him to hit me with his best shot!

View Quote Mustafa: Someone has asked what is new!
Horst: New?
Mustafa: Yes! What do I tell them?
Horst: Well, what did you tell them?
Mustafa: I told them I would ask!
Skinner: What are you blathering about?
Horst: Customers are asking what is new! What should I tell them?
Skinner: What did you tell them?
Mustafa: I told them I would ask!

View Quote R?my: [Describing the time after Ego gave his review] It was a great night. The happiest night of my life. But the only thing predictable about life is its unpredictability. [A sign saying "CLOSED" is placed on the front door of Gusteau's] Well, we had to let Skinner and the health inspector loose, and of course they ratted us out. The food didn't matter. Once it got out there were rats in the kitchen, oh, man, the restaurant was closed, and Ego lost his job and his credibility. But don't feel too bad for him. He's doing very well as a small business investor. He seems very happy.
Rat: How do you know? [R?my pulls back the leaves behind them to reveal the rats are in the attic of a restaurant. Ego is sitting beneath them, happily toasting his fellow customers. There is a dinging sound, and R?my turns to see Colette in the kitchen, gesturing at him]
R?my: Oh, gotta go. Dinner rush.

View Quote R?my: Dad, I...I don't know what to say.
Django: I was wrong about your friend, about you.
R?my: I don't want you to think I'm choosing this over family. I can't choose between two halves of myself.
Django: I'm not talkin' about cooking. I'm talkin' about guts.

View Quote R?my: He's your son?!
Gusteau: I have a son?!
R?my: How could you not know?!
Gusteau: I-I am a figment of your imagination! You did not know, how could I?

View Quote R?my: Hey I brought you something to--[sees Émile eating garbage] Ah! No, no, no, no! Spit that out right now! [he does] I have got to teach you about food. Close your eyes. [Émile obeys, R?my hands him piece of cheese] Now take a bite of thi...[Émile snarfs it] No, no, no! Don't just hork it down!
Émile: Too late.

View Quote R?my: What are you eating?
Émile: [looks at what he's eating as if for the first time] I don't really know. I think it was some sort of wrapper once.

View Quote Skinner: No, no, no, no, no, no-o-o-o-o!!
Lawyer: The DNA matches, the timing works, everything checks out. He is Gusteau's son.
Skinner: This can't just happen! The whole thing is a set up! The boy knows! [sees Linguini innocently cooking in kitchen] Look at him out there, pretending to be an idiot! He's toying with my mind like a cat with a ball of-of something!
Lawyer: String?
Skinner: Yes! Playing dumb, taunting me with that rat!
Lawyer: Rat?
Skinner: Yes! He's consorting with it, deliberately trying to make me think it's important!
Lawyer: The rat?
Skinner: Exactly!
Lawyer: [awkwardly] Is the rat important?
Skinner: Of course not! He just wants me to think that it is! Oh, I see the theatricality of it! A rat appears on the boy's first night, I order him to kill it, and now he wants me to see it everywhere! [snapping fingers] Oooooh! "Oooh, it's here! No, it isn't, it's here!" Am I seeing things, am I crazy?! Is there a Phantom Rat, or is there not?! Oh no! I refuse to be sucked into his little game, of--
Lawyer: [disturbed] Should I be concerned about this? About you?

View Quote [Colette walks into the kitchen and sees the rats cooking, and looks like she's going to vomit]
Linguini: Colette, wait! Colette. You came back. Colette...
Colette: Don't say a word. If I think about it, I might change my mind. Just tell me what the rat wants to cook.

View Quote [Django and Émile have just rescued R?my]
Django: Where are you going?
R?my: Back to the restaurant! They'll fail without me!
Django: Why do you care?
R?my: Because I'm a cook!

View Quote [Django shows R?my dead rats in exterminator shop]
Django: Take a good, long look, R?my. This what happens when a rat gets a little too comfortable around humans. The world we live in belongs to the enemy. We must live carefully. We look out for our own kind, R?my. When all is said and done, we're all we've got. [starts to walk away]
R?my: No.
Django: [stops] What?
R?my: No. Dad, I don't believe it. You're telling me that the future is, can only be, more of this?
Django: This is the way things are. You can't change nature.
R?my: Change is nature, Dad. The part that we can influence. And it starts when we decide. [he walks away]
Django: Where are you going?
R?my: With luck, forward.