Shaggy Dog, The (2006) quotes

View Quote Josh Douglas: He told me I can only play football if I keep my grades up. So I start to flunk in Math but he let me off with a warning. So now, I'm going to flunk English, Science, and Home Ec. There are not hard to fail.

View Quote Judge Claire Whittaker: [to Dave] Did you just growl at opposing counsel?

View Quote Rebecca Douglas: I didn't want to let you down. I'm just not good.

View Quote Tracy: Men are so complicated.

View Quote Carly: None of this would have happened if we hadn't stole Shaggy.
Dave: (as dog) YOU WHAT? STOLE HIM? You stole a dog from Grant & Strictland and you lied about it.
Trey: (holds up bone) Fetch boy!
Dave: I am not your boy and I'm not gonna fe... (Trey throws bone) Oh hey I'll be right back!
Dr.Lichtman:You Were A Very Bad Dog

View Quote Carly: Shaggy, would you stop making such a... That's impossible.
(The message read "I am Dad".)
Dave: (as a dog) Finally.
Josh: How?
(Dave scramble the letters to make a word: Grand and Strictland)
Josh: Grant and Strictland?
Dave: (as a dog) Yes.
Carly: Well, Mr. Forrester said that they were making mutant animals. That's when I found Shaggy but Shaggy bit Dad. Oh, Daddy!
Dave: (as a dog) It's okay, kiddo. It's okay.
Carly: I'm sorry this is all my fault. Could you please forgive me?
Dave: (as a dog) There's nothing to forgive.

View Quote Dave: (as a dog) Here. This is what you love because if you keep playing football, you're gonna get hurt.
Josh: Thanks, Dad.
Dave: (as a dog) Here's something else.
(Dave shows a Math book)
Josh: I know, I know.
Dave: (as a dog) Deal?
Josh: It's a deal.

View Quote Dave: Dr. Kozak, is it true your company is working on a drug that will extend human life like a 100 years?
Dr. Kozak: I am not at liberty to discuss that matter.
Dave: Of course you're not. But if that were true, that would be pretty big deal, right?
Dr. Kozak: If it were true, which it is not, probably.
Dave: Whoever is in charge of developing such a thing, who will not be only insanely wealthy, they will be immortalize in history, right? Ken:We Would Like To Recall Dr.Kozak To The Stand
Dr. Kozak: Yes, I suppose it would.
Dave: Wow. What a thrill it must be to work under Dr. Strictland.
(Dr. Kozak scratches his ear)
Dr. Kozak: Excuse me.
Dave: Dr. Strictland, your creative force of your company, right?
Dr. Kozak: Well, it takes many different people to contribute to the highter blahhh...
Dave: Yes, yes. What an honor it must be to work at Dr. Strictland's shadow.
Dr. Kozak: No, no, I don't work at anyone's shadow. Why would I could live myself?
Dave: Doctor's nothing wrong with second place. Second fiddle? Second bananas? Second up?
Dr. Kozak: I AM THE CHIEF SCIENTIST! I! ME! MY!
Dave: Oh, come on, you gone agitated self-dog pick a little virus in a lab, did you?
Dr. Kozak: It must be something while you're around.
(Dave and Dr. Kozak begin to growl at each other)
Judge Claire Whittaker:Ah No More Growling Mr.Douglas I've Had Enough

View Quote Dave: Dr. Kozak.
Dr. Kozak: Yes.
Dave: I'm sorry I couldn't put you on stand.
Dr. Kozak: Apology's not accepted. You know, Ken tells me if he steps down, you're gonna be the next district attorney.
Dave: Well, that's my hope.
Dr. Kozak: Certainly. Well hopefully, justice will be served. You have my support. As well as that, Grant & Strictland.

View Quote Dave: Well, that's the evidence of genetic mutation I don't know what is.
Judge Whittaker: On second thought, Bailey, take him to custody.
Dr. Kozak: For what? Just for little DNA, huh?! Don't you morons realize I can make us all immortal? Animals who care they don't even understand what is going on.
Dave: Don't tell me they don't understand. Animals understand. I know different.
Dr. Kozak: (laughs) This isn't over yet. We got so much in common. So, stay in touch, huh?

View Quote Dr. Kozak: I'm sorry you're a dog. I am also very sorry that you won't be leaving here alive. People will be wondering where you disappeared to. After all, dogs do wander off.
Dave: (as a dog) I can't believe you think you'll get away with this, Kozak.
Dr. Kozak: Unless before you die, we are going to run some tests on you. Eenie, meenie, minie, cut you, ow, your nose is coming off, because we just don't understand how you turned into him. I'm very excited. I just can't wait to get inside that body of yours and just poke around for...
(Dave bites Dr. Kozak's finger)
Dr. Kozak: Oh, you filthy little mongrul! That wasn't very nice.
Dave: (as a dog) Ooh, that hurt, didn't it?
Dr. Kozak: We have to work on that attitude when I get back. Meanwhile, we run upstairs for a minute. It seems Dr. Strictland is having bit of a healthy crisis. After that on the court, just when Forrester back down to save his skin, we'll cut you like a birthday cake later.

View Quote Dr. Kozak: When I called you to make sure these people were arrested?
Dave: I understand that. If you arrest them, they'll turn into rebels that cause on a 6 o'clock news. If you leave them there, they're just kids laying on a sidewalk.
Dr. Kozak: Good advice. Thanks for your help.
Dave: You bet. (releases hand to shake hands)
Dr. Kozak: I'm good.

View Quote Judge Whittaker: Mr. Douglas! Did you just growl at the opposing council?
Dave: No. I need some water.
Judge Whittaker: Do you need a brief recess?
Dave: No thanks. I just... (growls at Judge Whittaker)
Judge Whittaker: Did you just growl at me?
Dave: No, I had something caught in my throat... (growls at Judge Whittaker)
Judge Whittaker: One more outburst and I'm holding you in comtempt.
Dave: (barks) SILENCE! QUIET! WHOO! I think I could use a brief re... re...
Judge Whittaker: Reecess! Ten minutes.

View Quote Lance: Is that a snake's tail or a furry tail?
Dr. Kozak: That would be a minor side effect.
Lance: Kozak, growing a dog's tail would turn your serum into a criminal act.
Dr. Kozak: You know, you need to relax and have a good work, and Lance, we'll found a good fountain of youth. (answers the cellphone) Security, Dr. Kozak.

View Quote Lance: Kozak, how is it going in court today?
Dr. Kozak: Uh, Mr. Strictland, it goes well.
Lance: Have you unlocked the dog's secret?
Dr. Kozak: Let's not talk here. Hey, I've got something to show you that would interest you.