Mike Peters quotes

View Quote Eat, eat, you ****ing jackals!

View Quote Well, we're not in Kansas anymore.

View Quote Look, we're gonna spend half the night driving around the Hills looking for this one party and you're going to say it sucks and we're all gonna leave and then we're gonna go look for this other party. But all the parties and all the bars, they all suck. I spend half the night talking to some girl who's looking around the room to see if there's somebody else who's more important she should be talking to. And it's like I'm supposed to be all happy 'cause she's wearing a backpack, you know?

View Quote I took out $300, but 'm only betting with $100. I can't afford any more than that, all right? Now, I figure if we buy a lot of chips, the pit boss will comp us lots of free shit. That's how it works over there.

View Quote 'll have a scotch on the rocks. Any scotch will do, as long as it's not a blend, of course.

View Quote That was so ****ing money. That was like the Jedi mind shit.

View Quote Like a Las Vegas waitress is going to get an obscure French philosophical reference. It's like 'm trying to show off to her. I may as well have said 'let me jump your ignorant bones'.

View Quote This is Trent; we call him 'Double Down'.

View Quote You tell a chick you been some place: it's like braggin' that you know how to find it.

View Quote A Cavalier. It's red. It's a red Cavalier.

View Quote God bless you guys.

View Quote Haven't you seen Boyz N The Hood? Now one of us is going to get shot.

View Quote I got an agent who specializes in magicians.

View Quote Yo, Double Down, what time are we leaving?

View Quote That's my hog, right there.

View Quote That's not gonna be good enough. I want to make plans to see you.

View Quote 've been here for six months; all 've got to show for it is black lung.

View Quote How about if I wait six weeks? Tell her I was cleaning out my wallet and just happened to run into her number, I can't remember where we met. I'll ask her what she looks like and then I'll ask her if we ****ed. T, would that be the money?