2001: A Space Odyssey quotes

View Quote HAL: Dave, stop. Stop, will you? Stop, Dave. Will you stop, Dave? Stop, Dave. I'm afraid. I'm afraid, Dave. Dave, my mind is going. I can feel it. I can feel it. My mind is going. There is no question about it. I can feel it. I can feel it. I can feel it. I'm a... fraid. Good afternoon, gentlemen. I am a HAL 9000 computer. I became operational at the H.A.L. plant in Urbana, Illinois on the 12th of January 1992. My instructor was Mr. Langley, and he taught me to sing a song. If you'd like to hear it I can sing it for you.
Dave: Yes, I'd like to hear it, HAL. Sing it for me.
HAL: It's called "Daisy".
[HAL sings while slowing down.]
HAL: Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer do. I'm half crazy all for the love of you. It won't be a stylish marriage, I can't afford a carriage. But you'll look sweet upon the seat of a bicycle built for two.

View Quote HAL: I hope the two of you are not concerned about this.
Dave: No, I'm not HAL.
HAL: Are you quite sure?
Dave: Yeah. I'd like to ask you a question, though.
HAL: Of course.
Dave: How would you account for this discrepancy between you and the twin 9000?
HAL: Well, I don't think there is any question about it. It can only be attributable to human error. This sort of thing has cropped up before, and it has always been due to human error.
Frank: Listen HAL. There has never been any instance at all of a computer error occurring in the 9000 series, has there?
HAL: None whatsoever, Frank. The 9000 series has a perfect operational record.
Frank: Well of course I know all the wonderful achievements of the 9000 series, but, uh, are you certain there has never been any case of even the most insignificant computer error?
HAL: None whatsoever, Frank. Quite honestly, I wouldn't worry myself about that.
Dave: Well, I'm sure you're right, HAL. Uhm, fine, thanks very much.

View Quote [Dave and Frank are in the D pod, out of earshot of HAL.]
Frank: Well, what do you think?
Dave: I'm not sure. What do you think?
Frank: I've got a bad feeling about him.
Dave: You do?
Frank: Yeah, definitely. Don't you?
Dave: I don't know. I think so. You know, of course though, he's right about the 9000 series having a perfect operational record. They do.
Frank: : Unfortunately, that sounds a little like famous last words.
Dave: Yeah, still it was his idea to carry out the failure-mode analysis, wasn't it?
Frank: Hmm.
Dave: ...which should certainly indicate his integrity and self-confidence. If he were wrong, it would be the surest way of proving it.
Frank: It would be if he knew he was wrong.
Dave: Hmm.
Frank: But Dave, I can't put my finger on it, but I sense something strange about him.
Dave: Still, I can't think of a good reason not to put back the number one unit and carry on with the failure-mode analysis.
Frank: No, no, I agree about that.
Dave: Well, let's get on with it.
Frank: OK. Good luck, Dave.

View Quote [Floyd and Michaels choose sandwiches from a cooler while flying over the lunar surface.]
Dr. Floyd: What's that? Chicken?
Dr. Bill Michaels: Something like that. Tastes the same anyway.

View Quote [On Dave's return to the ship, after HAL has killed the rest of the crew] Look Dave, I can see you're really upset about this. I honestly think you ought to sit down calmly, take a stress pill, and think things over. I know I've made some very poor decisions recently, but I can give you my complete assurance that my work will be back to normal. I've still got the greatest enthusiasm and confidence in the mission. And I want to help you.

View Quote I am completely operational, and all my circuits are functioning perfectly.

View Quote I am the H.A.L 9000. You may call me Hal.

View Quote I know everything hasn't been quite right with me, but I can assure you now, very confidently, that it's going to be all right again. I feel much better now. I really do.

View Quote Just a moment. Just a moment. I've just picked up a fault in the AE-35 unit. It's going to go 100% failure in 72 hours.

View Quote Just what do you think you're doing, Dave? Dave, I really think I'm entitled to an answer to that question.