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Elinor: Merida, a princess does not place her weapons on the table.
Merida: [moans] Mum, it's just my bow!
Elinor: A princess should not have weapons in my opinion.
Fergus: Leave her be! Princess or not, learning to fight is essential.
Merida: [removes her bow from the table] Mum, you'll never guess what I did today!
Elinor: [not really listening] Mmm-hmm?
Merida: I climbed up the Crone's Tooth and drank from the Fire Falls.
[Hamish, Hubert and Harris look at her in awe]
Fergus: The Fire Falls, eh? They say only the ancient kings were brave enough to drink the fire.
[Merida wrinkles her nose at Fergus and giggles]
Elinor: [looks up from the do****ents she's reading; to Merida] What did you do, dear?
Merida: [disappointed] Nothing, Mum.
Elinor: Hungry aren’t we.
Merida: Mum.
Merida: [moans] Mum, it's just my bow!
Elinor: A princess should not have weapons in my opinion.
Fergus: Leave her be! Princess or not, learning to fight is essential.
Merida: [removes her bow from the table] Mum, you'll never guess what I did today!
Elinor: [not really listening] Mmm-hmm?
Merida: I climbed up the Crone's Tooth and drank from the Fire Falls.
[Hamish, Hubert and Harris look at her in awe]
Fergus: The Fire Falls, eh? They say only the ancient kings were brave enough to drink the fire.
[Merida wrinkles her nose at Fergus and giggles]
Elinor: [looks up from the do****ents she's reading; to Merida] What did you do, dear?
Merida: [disappointed] Nothing, Mum.
Elinor: Hungry aren’t we.
Merida: Mum.
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Fergus: [telling a story] Then out of nowhere, the biggest bear you've ever seen! Its hide littered with the weapons of fallen warriors! Its face scarred with one dead eye. I drew my sword and...
Princess Merida: [cuts in] WHOOSH! 1 swipe, his sword shattered, then CHOMP! Dad's leg was clean off! Down the monster's throat it went!
Fergus: Awwwwww... That's my favorite part!
Merida: Mor'du has never been seen since. And is roaming the wilds, waiting his chance at revenge. [roars]
Fergus: Let him return. I’ll finish what I gobbled in the first place.
Princess Merida: [cuts in] WHOOSH! 1 swipe, his sword shattered, then CHOMP! Dad's leg was clean off! Down the monster's throat it went!
Fergus: Awwwwww... That's my favorite part!
Merida: Mor'du has never been seen since. And is roaming the wilds, waiting his chance at revenge. [roars]
Fergus: Let him return. I’ll finish what I gobbled in the first place.
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Fergus: Oh, come on, now! Pretend I'm Merida, speak to me. What would you say?
Elinor: I can't do this!
Fergus: Sure, you can! [Elinor gives him a skeptical look] There, there! That's my queen! All right, here we go. [takes a deep breath and speaks in a shrilly voice, impersonating Merida] "I don't want to get married! I want to stay single and let my hair flow in the wind as I ride through the glen, firing arrows into the sunset!" [smiles and nods. Elinor smiles and takes a deep breath.]
Elinor: Merida, all this work, all the time spent preparing you, schooling you, giving you everything we never had. I ask you, what do you expect us to do?
Merida: [in the royal stables; taking care of Angus and rehearsing her own speech] Call off the gathering! Would that kill them? You're the queen. You can just tell the lords, "The princess is not ready for this. In fact, she might not ever be ready for this, so that's that. Good day to you. We'll expect your declarations of war in the morning."
Elinor: I understand this must all seem unfair. Even I had reservations when I faced betrothal. [Fergus looks up in surprise] But we can't just run away from who we are.
Merida: I don't want my life to be over. I want my freedom!
Elinor: But are you willing to pay the price your freedom will cost?
Merida: I'm not doing any of this to hurt you.
Elinor: If you could just try to see what I do, I do out of love.
Merida: But it's my life, it's... I'm just not ready.
Elinor: I think you'd see if you could just...
Merida: I think I could make you understand if you would just...
Elinor: Listen.
Merida: Listen. [Angus whinnies at her] I swear, Angus, this isn't going to happen. [Angus touches her sympathetically and she pets him] Not if I have any say in it.
Elinor: I can't do this!
Fergus: Sure, you can! [Elinor gives him a skeptical look] There, there! That's my queen! All right, here we go. [takes a deep breath and speaks in a shrilly voice, impersonating Merida] "I don't want to get married! I want to stay single and let my hair flow in the wind as I ride through the glen, firing arrows into the sunset!" [smiles and nods. Elinor smiles and takes a deep breath.]
Elinor: Merida, all this work, all the time spent preparing you, schooling you, giving you everything we never had. I ask you, what do you expect us to do?
Merida: [in the royal stables; taking care of Angus and rehearsing her own speech] Call off the gathering! Would that kill them? You're the queen. You can just tell the lords, "The princess is not ready for this. In fact, she might not ever be ready for this, so that's that. Good day to you. We'll expect your declarations of war in the morning."
Elinor: I understand this must all seem unfair. Even I had reservations when I faced betrothal. [Fergus looks up in surprise] But we can't just run away from who we are.
Merida: I don't want my life to be over. I want my freedom!
Elinor: But are you willing to pay the price your freedom will cost?
Merida: I'm not doing any of this to hurt you.
Elinor: If you could just try to see what I do, I do out of love.
Merida: But it's my life, it's... I'm just not ready.
Elinor: I think you'd see if you could just...
Merida: I think I could make you understand if you would just...
Elinor: Listen.
Merida: Listen. [Angus whinnies at her] I swear, Angus, this isn't going to happen. [Angus touches her sympathetically and she pets him] Not if I have any say in it.
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Merida: [after Young MacGuffin shoots and misses] I bet he wishes he was tossing cabers.
Fergus: Or holding up bridges...
[Elinor nudges Fergus scoldingly while he and Merida snicker]
Fergus: Or holding up bridges...
[Elinor nudges Fergus scoldingly while he and Merida snicker]
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Merida: [looks up and sees Elinor has changed back into a human] Mum, you're back! You changed!
Elinor: [warmly] Oh, darling. We both have.
About Brave (2012 film)[edit]
Elinor: [warmly] Oh, darling. We both have.
About Brave (2012 film)[edit]
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Merida: Mum, wait. We have to...
Fergus: Follow me.
Merida: Stop! STOP! YOU’RE COVERED WITH FUR!! You’re not naked. It’s like anyone gonna see you. Now you done it.
[Maudie runs into Fergus and the others]
Fergus: Maudie! [Maudie stutters] Calm down, lass. What is it? [Maudie still stutters] [impatiently] Spit it out, Maudie!
Maudie: BEEEEAR!!!
Fergus: I KNEW IT!! HYAAAAAH!! [he and the other men charge to where Maudie came from]
Merida: Would you just listen me.
Fergus: Follow me.
Merida: Stop! STOP! YOU’RE COVERED WITH FUR!! You’re not naked. It’s like anyone gonna see you. Now you done it.
[Maudie runs into Fergus and the others]
Fergus: Maudie! [Maudie stutters] Calm down, lass. What is it? [Maudie still stutters] [impatiently] Spit it out, Maudie!
Maudie: BEEEEAR!!!
Fergus: I KNEW IT!! HYAAAAAH!! [he and the other men charge to where Maudie came from]
Merida: Would you just listen me.
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Young Merida: I missed...
Elinor: Go and fetch it, then. [turns to Fergus after Merida leaves] A bow, Fergus? She's a lady! [Fergus grabs her butt] Oh! You!
Elinor: Go and fetch it, then. [turns to Fergus after Merida leaves] A bow, Fergus? She's a lady! [Fergus grabs her butt] Oh! You!
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[Fergus, the lords, their sons, and the rest of the men are being distracted by the triplets, thinking there's a bear in the castle]
Lord MacGuffin: I think we should lay a trap.
Fergus: [angrily] TRY SHUTTING YOURS! [They then hear a growl and see a shadow of a bear] There he is!
[They chase it up the castle roof and realize it is gone]
Lord Dingwall: It must've sprouted wings.
Lord MacGuffin: Or was carried away by a giant birdy.
Lord Dingwall: A dragon, perhaps.
Lord Macintosh: [mockingly] "Bear in the castle!" [normal] Doesn't make sense. It cannot open doors. He's got big, giant paws!
King Fergus: [groans] Let's just get inside. [tries to open the door, but can't] It's locked!
Lord MacGuffin: [points to Dingwall] Dingwall was the last up!
Lord Dingwall: I propped it open with a stick!
[The men groan, and from the other side of the door, it is revealed that two of the triplets took the stick and chucked it away]
Lord MacGuffin: I think we should lay a trap.
Fergus: [angrily] TRY SHUTTING YOURS! [They then hear a growl and see a shadow of a bear] There he is!
[They chase it up the castle roof and realize it is gone]
Lord Dingwall: It must've sprouted wings.
Lord MacGuffin: Or was carried away by a giant birdy.
Lord Dingwall: A dragon, perhaps.
Lord Macintosh: [mockingly] "Bear in the castle!" [normal] Doesn't make sense. It cannot open doors. He's got big, giant paws!
King Fergus: [groans] Let's just get inside. [tries to open the door, but can't] It's locked!
Lord MacGuffin: [points to Dingwall] Dingwall was the last up!
Lord Dingwall: I propped it open with a stick!
[The men groan, and from the other side of the door, it is revealed that two of the triplets took the stick and chucked it away]
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[Merida – assisted by Bear Elinor – asks the lords' sons to write their own stories, follow their hearts, and find love in their own time]
Lord Macintosh: Well, since you've obviously made up your minds about this, I have one thing to say: This is–
Young Macintosh: [interrupting in a gleeful tone] A GRAND IDEA! [to his father] Give us our own say in choosing our fate.
Lord Macintosh: [stunned with outrage] WHAT?!
Wee Dingwall: Aye. Why shouldn't we choose?
Lord Dingwall: [also stunned] But she's the princess!
Wee Dingwall: I didn't pick her out. It was your idea.
Lord MacGuffin: [to his son] And you, you... feel the same way?
Young MacGuffin: [in a thick accent] It's just not fair making us fight for the hand of a quine who doesn't want any bit of it. Good?
[The Dingwalls and Macintoshes stare at each other confused; Merida giggles]
Lord Macintosh: Well, since you've obviously made up your minds about this, I have one thing to say: This is–
Young Macintosh: [interrupting in a gleeful tone] A GRAND IDEA! [to his father] Give us our own say in choosing our fate.
Lord Macintosh: [stunned with outrage] WHAT?!
Wee Dingwall: Aye. Why shouldn't we choose?
Lord Dingwall: [also stunned] But she's the princess!
Wee Dingwall: I didn't pick her out. It was your idea.
Lord MacGuffin: [to his son] And you, you... feel the same way?
Young MacGuffin: [in a thick accent] It's just not fair making us fight for the hand of a quine who doesn't want any bit of it. Good?
[The Dingwalls and Macintoshes stare at each other confused; Merida giggles]
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[Merida and Bear Elinor reach the witch's cottage]
Merida: I can't believe it. I found it. [excitedly opens the door, only to find the cottage completely empty with only the cauldron still in the middle; confused] No. She was here. [closes the door; to Bear Elinor] No, really, she was just here. [Bear Elinor whines] Oh, wait. [snaps her fingers then opens the door again, but finds it the same as before] No. [bangs the door shut. Tries again several times, but to no avail] No, no. No! No! [steps in the door and accidentally trips a wire, starting a Rube Goldberg machine that eventually shoots a knife, nearly killing Merida. The cauldron begins to bubble and glow green. Merida and Bear Elinor walk over. A ghostly image of the witch appears above the cauldron]
Witch: Welcome to the Crafty Carver, home of bear-themed carvings and novelties. I am completely out of stock at this time. But, if you'd like to inquire about portraits or wedding cake toppers, pour vial one into the cauldron. If you'd like the menu in Gaelic, vial two. If you're that red-haired lass, vial three. To speak with a live homunculus-- [Merida quickly grabs the third vial, pops it open and pours its contents into the cauldron] Princess! I'm off to the Wickerman Festival in Stornoway and won't be back till spring. There's one bit I forgot to tell you about the spell. By the second sunrise, your spell will become permanent, [Merida gasps] unless you remember these words: [turns red] "Fate be changed, look inside, mend the bond torn by pride." [turns back to green]
Merida: [confused] "Fate be changed?" "Mend the bond?" What does that mean?
Witch: One more time. [turns red again] "Fate be changed, look inside, mend the bond torn by pride." [turns back to green again; cheerfully] That's it! Tah-tah! Oh, and thank you for shopping at the Crafty Carver! [disappears]
Merida: [panicking] No. No! Where'd you go? [pours another vial into the cauldron]
Witch: [suddenly reappears] Welcome to the Crafty Carver...
Merida: [horrified] What?
Witch: ...for all your-- [Merida pours in another vial, causing the speech to overlap]
Merida: Maybe there's a book of spells. [to Bear Elinor] Look around. We'll need more vials. [proceeds to frantically dump in the last two vials]
Witch: I'm off to the Wickerman Festival in Stornoway, and-- [all of the messages begin talking over one another. Merida and Bear Elinor brace for impact] Thank you for visiting. Have a lovely day! [the cauldron explodes, tearing apart the cottage]
Merida: I can't believe it. I found it. [excitedly opens the door, only to find the cottage completely empty with only the cauldron still in the middle; confused] No. She was here. [closes the door; to Bear Elinor] No, really, she was just here. [Bear Elinor whines] Oh, wait. [snaps her fingers then opens the door again, but finds it the same as before] No. [bangs the door shut. Tries again several times, but to no avail] No, no. No! No! [steps in the door and accidentally trips a wire, starting a Rube Goldberg machine that eventually shoots a knife, nearly killing Merida. The cauldron begins to bubble and glow green. Merida and Bear Elinor walk over. A ghostly image of the witch appears above the cauldron]
Witch: Welcome to the Crafty Carver, home of bear-themed carvings and novelties. I am completely out of stock at this time. But, if you'd like to inquire about portraits or wedding cake toppers, pour vial one into the cauldron. If you'd like the menu in Gaelic, vial two. If you're that red-haired lass, vial three. To speak with a live homunculus-- [Merida quickly grabs the third vial, pops it open and pours its contents into the cauldron] Princess! I'm off to the Wickerman Festival in Stornoway and won't be back till spring. There's one bit I forgot to tell you about the spell. By the second sunrise, your spell will become permanent, [Merida gasps] unless you remember these words: [turns red] "Fate be changed, look inside, mend the bond torn by pride." [turns back to green]
Merida: [confused] "Fate be changed?" "Mend the bond?" What does that mean?
Witch: One more time. [turns red again] "Fate be changed, look inside, mend the bond torn by pride." [turns back to green again; cheerfully] That's it! Tah-tah! Oh, and thank you for shopping at the Crafty Carver! [disappears]
Merida: [panicking] No. No! Where'd you go? [pours another vial into the cauldron]
Witch: [suddenly reappears] Welcome to the Crafty Carver...
Merida: [horrified] What?
Witch: ...for all your-- [Merida pours in another vial, causing the speech to overlap]
Merida: Maybe there's a book of spells. [to Bear Elinor] Look around. We'll need more vials. [proceeds to frantically dump in the last two vials]
Witch: I'm off to the Wickerman Festival in Stornoway, and-- [all of the messages begin talking over one another. Merida and Bear Elinor brace for impact] Thank you for visiting. Have a lovely day! [the cauldron explodes, tearing apart the cottage]
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[Merida discovers that the woodcarver is a witch]
Merida: [excitedly] You're a WITCH!
The Witch: [still trying to hide her identity] Woodcarver.
Merida: That's why the wisps led me here!
Witch: [getting angry] Woodcarver!
Merida: [more excited] You'll change my fate!
Witch: [more angry] WOODCARVER!!
Merida: You see... It's my mother–
Witch: [snaps] I'M NOT A WITCH! TOO MANY UNSATISFIED CUSTOMERS! [Merida stares at her in fright. The witch calms down] If you're not going to buy anything… get out! [snaps fingers and knives point at Merida]
Merida: [excitedly] You're a WITCH!
The Witch: [still trying to hide her identity] Woodcarver.
Merida: That's why the wisps led me here!
Witch: [getting angry] Woodcarver!
Merida: [more excited] You'll change my fate!
Witch: [more angry] WOODCARVER!!
Merida: You see... It's my mother–
Witch: [snaps] I'M NOT A WITCH! TOO MANY UNSATISFIED CUSTOMERS! [Merida stares at her in fright. The witch calms down] If you're not going to buy anything… get out! [snaps fingers and knives point at Merida]
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[Queen Elinor feels sick after eating a cursed cake.]
Merida: Just take all the time you need to get yourself right, mom. And maybe in a bit you might have something new to say on the marriage?
Elinor: [groaning] What was in that cake?
Merida: Cake!?
[suddenly Elinor rolls of the bed in pain]
Merida: Mum? So, I… I’ll just tell them the wedding’s off then. [hears a growling noise from where Elinor rolled of down the bed] Mum? [walks round to see if Elinor is fine, she sees a giant shape under the blanket. It rises from the floor and the blanket falls off, revealing Elinor has transformed into a bear making Merida scream with terror] BEAR!!!
Merida: Just take all the time you need to get yourself right, mom. And maybe in a bit you might have something new to say on the marriage?
Elinor: [groaning] What was in that cake?
Merida: Cake!?
[suddenly Elinor rolls of the bed in pain]
Merida: Mum? So, I… I’ll just tell them the wedding’s off then. [hears a growling noise from where Elinor rolled of down the bed] Mum? [walks round to see if Elinor is fine, she sees a giant shape under the blanket. It rises from the floor and the blanket falls off, revealing Elinor has transformed into a bear making Merida scream with terror] BEAR!!!
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[Somebody just called Lord Dingwall a liar]
Lord Dingwall: I heard that! Come on! Say it to my face, or are you scared simperin' jackanapes, 'fraid to muss your pretty hair?!
Lord Macintosh: At least we have hair!
Lord MacGuffin: And all our teeth!
Young MacGuffin: [in a thick accent] If he was a wee bit closer, I could lob a caber at him, ye ken?
Lord Macintosh: [confused at first, then regains composure] And we don't hide under bridges, you grumpy old troll!
[The Macintoshes, Macguffins and Fergus chortle]
Dingwall: You wanna laugh, eh? [to his son] WEE DINGWALL!
[Wee Dingwall attacks Lord Macintosh, starting a brawl]
Lord Dingwall: I heard that! Come on! Say it to my face, or are you scared simperin' jackanapes, 'fraid to muss your pretty hair?!
Lord Macintosh: At least we have hair!
Lord MacGuffin: And all our teeth!
Young MacGuffin: [in a thick accent] If he was a wee bit closer, I could lob a caber at him, ye ken?
Lord Macintosh: [confused at first, then regains composure] And we don't hide under bridges, you grumpy old troll!
[The Macintoshes, Macguffins and Fergus chortle]
Dingwall: You wanna laugh, eh? [to his son] WEE DINGWALL!
[Wee Dingwall attacks Lord Macintosh, starting a brawl]
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[The witch picks up the cake from the boiling cauldron]
Witch: HEY!
Merida: [confused] A cake?
Witch: [sounding angry] You don't want it?
Merida: Yes, I want it! Are you sure... if I give this to my Mum, it will change my fate?
Witch: [chuckles] It'll do the trick, deary.
Witch: HEY!
Merida: [confused] A cake?
Witch: [sounding angry] You don't want it?
Merida: Yes, I want it! Are you sure... if I give this to my Mum, it will change my fate?
Witch: [chuckles] It'll do the trick, deary.
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[Young Macintosh smashes his bow on the ground after barely missing the bullseye]
Merida: [sarcastically] Oh, that's attractive.
[Young Macintosh throws his bow over the crowd]
Random Clan Member: I got it!
Merida: [to King Fergus] Good arm!
Fergus: [brushes back his hair] And such lovely, flowing locks.
Elinor: [annoyed] Fergus!
Fergus: What?
Merida: [sarcastically] Oh, that's attractive.
[Young Macintosh throws his bow over the crowd]
Random Clan Member: I got it!
Merida: [to King Fergus] Good arm!
Fergus: [brushes back his hair] And such lovely, flowing locks.
Elinor: [annoyed] Fergus!
Fergus: What?