Jay quotes
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I'm Jay, and this is my hetero life-mate Silent Bob.
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Go back to your paper routes, you Mighty Duck ****s!
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Snoogens! Did you see that shit, man? I know they were just kids, but we kicked their pube-less asses!
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We figure abortion clinics are a good place to meet loose women. Why else would they be here unless they like to ****?
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No wonder he saw Jesus. Homey's rockin' the ganj!
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I guess we're in charge of the gang now.
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[awaking from a dream] I didn't **** in you, Pete, I swear.
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Hey, Big Bird! Ready to play the counting game? Count the shells, suck-a-duck!
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It's the end of the world, we got about five minutes... you said you'd **** me.
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I feel like I'm Han Solo and you're Chewie (referring to Silent Bob) and she's Ben Kenobi (referring to Bethany) and we're in that '****ed-up' bar!
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Gear?! Like I ever drove before.
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What the **** do I know 'bout shiftin'?
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She's a slut. Ba-a-a-a-ng.
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So that would make Bethany part black? (after Rufus explains that Bethany is a direct descendant of Jesus)
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Wait, you mean Silent Bob's an instrument of God?
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Kill it! (after Rufus wakes up from his fall)
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You know, you can have sex until the third trimester? (after Bethany reveals that she is pregnant)
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Steady. You wanna be my girlfriend? (looks at Silent Bob) Ok, but Silent Bob gets to live with us and you pay the rent.