[Azrael has Bethany and the others captive at a bar]
Bethany: So he's (Azrael) a muse too?
Serendipity: Former muse. [to Azrael in a sing-song voice] He was kicked out!
Azrael: Ever the ****ing apple polisher.
Bethany: So, what happened?
Azrael: Yes, what? Well, Lucifer had to start his little war for the throne; Heaven became divided into two factions: the Faithful and the Renegades. Oh, the ethereal planes were chaotic with battles, angel against angel, and when it was all said and done, God cast the rebels into perdition--
Serendipity: But Azrael refused to fight. He remained in the middle, waiting to see who came out victorious.
Jay: What are you? Some kinda ****in' chicken?
Azrael: No .I was an artist, stupid! I was inspiration! A muse has no place in battle.
Serendipity: So after the fallen were banished to Hell, God turned on those who wouldn't fight, and Azrael was sent down with the demons; something he considers a "grave injustice".
Azrael: Oh, come on. Don't tell me you never questioned the judgment, Serendipity.
Serendipity: Nope. It never bothered me. So you were an artist. Big deal! Elvis was an artist, but that didn't stop him from serving his country in time of war. That's why he's the King, and you're a shmuck!
Azrael: [sourly] Nice.
Bethany: So all of this is about revenge? You're going to unmake existence because you have a grudge against God?
Azrael: After the first million years? No; the escape from Hell became my all-consuming reason. So, I studied up on the religions and waited for my opportunity to present itself, which it did in Catholicism--Plenary Indulgence--but I couldn't exercise it; demons can't become human. No, we can't tran-substantiate, but angels can.
Bethany: Bartleby and Loki.
Azrael: [he taps his finger to his temple as to indicate that she's figured it out] After that, it was all a matter of waiting for a church to celebrate their bicentennial, and when it did, I sent the pair an article laced with ideas. An incantation I picked up in the pit kept them cloaked and off of Heaven's radars, and aside from the triplets here and the Golgothan, not a soul in Hell had a clue as to what was going on. But, the Almighty could still splooch the whole deal, so I had Him dispatched in a fairly ingenious fashion.
Serendipity: [correcting Azrael] Her. And how? That's the only thing I couldn't figure out.
Azrael: Oh, no. I've seen way too many Bond movies to know that you don't reveal all the details of your plan, no matter how close you think you are to winning. [Serendipity sighs in mock disappointment] The only x-factor was the involvement of the Last Scion here, but fat lotta good that did ya. I mean, here you all are. [he tosses his machine gun to one of the triplets] Powerless to stop the inevitable.
Bethany: Look, asshole. I don't know if anyone's explained the rules to you, but if you succeed, everything gets blinked out of existence; even you!
Azrael: Human, have you ever been to Hell? I think not. I'd rather not exist than go back to that, and if everyone has to go down with me, so be it!
Serendipity: [gets out of her seat and pushes Azrael] Still only thinking about yourself; you ****in' child!
Azrael: [calmly speaking and forcefully pushing her back into her seat having one of the triplets guard her] Now ,now, now, things are getting a little hectic in here.
Bethany: So he's (Azrael) a muse too?
Serendipity: Former muse. [to Azrael in a sing-song voice] He was kicked out!
Azrael: Ever the ****ing apple polisher.
Bethany: So, what happened?
Azrael: Yes, what? Well, Lucifer had to start his little war for the throne; Heaven became divided into two factions: the Faithful and the Renegades. Oh, the ethereal planes were chaotic with battles, angel against angel, and when it was all said and done, God cast the rebels into perdition--
Serendipity: But Azrael refused to fight. He remained in the middle, waiting to see who came out victorious.
Jay: What are you? Some kinda ****in' chicken?
Azrael: No .I was an artist, stupid! I was inspiration! A muse has no place in battle.
Serendipity: So after the fallen were banished to Hell, God turned on those who wouldn't fight, and Azrael was sent down with the demons; something he considers a "grave injustice".
Azrael: Oh, come on. Don't tell me you never questioned the judgment, Serendipity.
Serendipity: Nope. It never bothered me. So you were an artist. Big deal! Elvis was an artist, but that didn't stop him from serving his country in time of war. That's why he's the King, and you're a shmuck!
Azrael: [sourly] Nice.
Bethany: So all of this is about revenge? You're going to unmake existence because you have a grudge against God?
Azrael: After the first million years? No; the escape from Hell became my all-consuming reason. So, I studied up on the religions and waited for my opportunity to present itself, which it did in Catholicism--Plenary Indulgence--but I couldn't exercise it; demons can't become human. No, we can't tran-substantiate, but angels can.
Bethany: Bartleby and Loki.
Azrael: [he taps his finger to his temple as to indicate that she's figured it out] After that, it was all a matter of waiting for a church to celebrate their bicentennial, and when it did, I sent the pair an article laced with ideas. An incantation I picked up in the pit kept them cloaked and off of Heaven's radars, and aside from the triplets here and the Golgothan, not a soul in Hell had a clue as to what was going on. But, the Almighty could still splooch the whole deal, so I had Him dispatched in a fairly ingenious fashion.
Serendipity: [correcting Azrael] Her. And how? That's the only thing I couldn't figure out.
Azrael: Oh, no. I've seen way too many Bond movies to know that you don't reveal all the details of your plan, no matter how close you think you are to winning. [Serendipity sighs in mock disappointment] The only x-factor was the involvement of the Last Scion here, but fat lotta good that did ya. I mean, here you all are. [he tosses his machine gun to one of the triplets] Powerless to stop the inevitable.
Bethany: Look, asshole. I don't know if anyone's explained the rules to you, but if you succeed, everything gets blinked out of existence; even you!
Azrael: Human, have you ever been to Hell? I think not. I'd rather not exist than go back to that, and if everyone has to go down with me, so be it!
Serendipity: [gets out of her seat and pushes Azrael] Still only thinking about yourself; you ****in' child!
Azrael: [calmly speaking and forcefully pushing her back into her seat having one of the triplets guard her] Now ,now, now, things are getting a little hectic in here.
[Azrael has Bethany and the others captive at a bar]
Bethany : So he's (Azrael) a muse too?
Serendipity : Former muse. [to Azrael in a sing-song voice] He was kicked out!
Azrael : Ever the ****ing apple polisher.
Bethany : So, what happened?
Azrael : Yes, what? Well, Lucifer had to start his little war for the throne; Heaven became divided into two factions: the Faithful and the Renegades. Oh, the ethereal planes were chaotic with battles, angel against angel, and when it was all said and done, God cast the rebels into perdition--
Serendipity : But Azrael refused to fight. He remained in the middle, waiting to see who came out victorious.
Jay : What are you? Some kinda ****in' chicken?
Azrael : No .I was an artist , stupid! I was inspiration! A muse has no place in battle.
Serendipity : So after the fallen were banished to Hell, God turned on those who wouldn't fight, and Azrael was sent down with the demons; something he considers a "grave injustice".
Azrael : Oh, come on. Don't tell me you never questioned the judgment, Serendipity.
Serendipity : Nope. It never bothered me. So you were an artist. Big deal! Elvis was an artist, but that didn't stop him from serving his country in time of war. That's why he's the King, and you're a shmuck!
Azrael : [sourly] Nice.
Bethany : So all of this is about revenge? You're going to unmake existence because you have a grudge against God?
Azrael : After the first million years? No; the escape from Hell became my all-consuming reason. So, I studied up on the religions and waited for my opportunity to present itself, which it did in Catholicism--Plenary Indulgence--but I couldn't exercise it; demons can't become human. No, we can't tran-substantiate, but angels can.
Bethany : Bartleby and Loki.
Azrael : [he taps his finger to his temple as to indicate that she's figured it out] After that, it was all a matter of waiting for a church to celebrate their bicentennial, and when it did, I sent the pair an article laced with ideas. An incantation I picked up in the pit kept them cloaked and off of Heaven's radars, and aside from the triplets here and the Golgothan, not a soul in Hell had a clue as to what was going on. But, the Almighty could still splooch the whole deal, so I had Him dispatched in a fairly ingenious fashion.
Serendipity : [correcting Azrael] Her. And how? That's the only thing I couldn't figure out.
Azrael : Oh, no. I've seen way too many Bond movies to know that you don't reveal all the details of your plan, no matter how close you think you are to winning. [Serendipity sighs in mock disappointment] The only x-factor was the involvement of the Last Scion here, but fat lotta good that did ya. I mean, here you all are. [he tosses his machine gun to one of the triplets] Powerless to stop the inevitable.
Bethany : Look, asshole. I don't know if anyone's explained the rules to you, but if you succeed, everything gets blinked out of existence; even you!
Azrael : Human, have you ever been to Hell? I think not. I'd rather not exist than go back to that, and if everyone has to go down with me, so be it!
Serendipity : [gets out of her seat and pushes Azrael] Still only thinking about yourself; you ****in' child!
Azrael : [calmly speaking and forcefully pushing her back into her seat having one of the triplets guard her] Now ,now, now, things are getting a little hectic in here.
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