Good Morning, Vietnam quotes

View Quote Dreiwitz: What is the appeal of Joey Bishop? I mean, the man's not funny. I know funny, and he's not funny. Don't get me wrong- he seems like a nice guy- but my father's a nice guy and he's not funny either. Joey Bishop. I wish someone would explain this one to me.

View Quote Jimmy Wah: [About Hong Kong] Home of the shiiiny green suit.

View Quote Trinh: I-- I not can do this, Cronow. No. No friend, Cronow. Not good for-- for me. My brother, OK, friends. But Vietnam ladies not friends. Please, OK? Not friends.

View Quote Adrian as Camp Fashion Consultant: I want to tell you something. You know, this whole camouflage thing, for me, doesn't work very well.
Adrian: Why is that?
Adrian as Camp Fashion Consultant: Because you go in the jungle, I can't see you. You know, it's like wearing stripes and plaid. For me, I want to do something different. You know, you go in the jungle, make a statement. If you're going to fight, clash. You know what I mean?

View Quote Adrian: Is it true that you're actually-- that you're actually too close to some of the nerve agents they were testing?
Adrian as Gomer: Nerve... uh, gas?
Adrian: Yes, have you used any?
Adrian as Gomer: Well, once, yes, on myself. And it had no-- WOAH! WOAH! No effect on me. I've had no actual-- WOAH! SHE-HOO! WOAH! WOAH! Big dogs! Big dogs landing on my face!
Adrian: I don't know what that means.

View Quote Adrian: Listen, I gave you my friendship, and my trust. And now they tell me that my best friend is the goddamn enemy.
Tuan: Enemy? What is enemy? You killing my own people so many miles from your home. We not the enemy. You the enemy.
Adrian: You used me to kill two people. Two ****ing people died in that ****ing bar.
Tuan: Big ****ing deal! My mother dead. And my older brother, who be 29 years old, he dead. Shot by Americans. My neighbor, dead. His wife, dead. Why? Because we're not human to them. We're only little Vietnamese. And I'm stupid enough to save your bullshit life at An Lac.

View Quote Adrian: Once again we've got our friend from military intelligence. Can you tell us what you've found out about the enemy since you've been here?
Adrian as Gomer: We found out that we can't find them. They're out there, and we're having a major difficulty in finding the enemy.
Adrian: Well, what do you use to look for them?
Adrian as Gomer: Well, we ask people, 'Are you the enemy? And whoever says yes, we shoot them. [Pause] It's very difficult to find a Vietnamese man named Charlie. They're all named Nyugen or Doh or things like that. It's very difficult for me.

View Quote Adrian: We've got our traffic report up there on the Ho Chi Minh Trail. How's it going up there?
Adrian as Reporter: Well, Adrian, it's not going exactly well. There's a water buffalo jackknifed up there. It's not a very pretty picture, there's horns everywhere. I dunno what to say, we're gonna maybe drop in a little napalm there, try to cook him down, have a little barbecue.

View Quote Adrian: What's the demilitarized zone? It sounds like something out of the Wizard of Oz
Adrian as Glinda: Oh no don't go in there!
Adrian as Soldier: Ohhh wee ohh. Ho Chi Minh.
Adrian as Glinda: Oh look you've landed in Saigon. You're among the little people now.
Adrian as Munchkin: We represent the ARVN army, the ARVN army. Oh no! Follow the Ho Chi Minh trail! Follow the Ho Chi Minh trail!
Adrain as Witch: Oh! I'll get you my pretty!
Adrian: Oh my God! It's the wicked Witch of the North! It's Hanoi Hannah!
Adrain as Witch: Now, little GI, you and your little Toto too!

View Quote Adrian: You could get in trouble for that.
Garlick: I requisitioned for a name change. Trouble is actually my new middle name.

View Quote Dickerson: [Pointing to his rank insignia] What does three up and three down mean to you, Airman?
Adrian: End of an inning?

View Quote Dickerson: This is not military issue, Airman. What sort of uniform is that?
Adrian: Cretan camouflage. If you want to blend into a crowd of drunken Greeks there's nothing better.
Dickerson: That is humor. I recognize that. I also recognize your species of soldier. I had a guy like you in the field one time. He blew himself to pieces. But not before his humor cost the lives of three very fine individuals.

View Quote Garlick: Gentlemen! Hey guys, guess who the hell I got in here.
Man 1: Groucho Marx!
Man 2: Senator Dirksen.
Man 3: Curly!
Garlick: Come on. Come on, come on, come on! Guess again.
Adrian: Oh bag it, bag it, Garlick.
Garlick: The fellow I got in here is the gentleman, the one and the only
Adrian: Oh, you're a dead man.
Garlick: The king of the airwaves, Adrian Cronauer.

View Quote Garlick: I'm Private First Class Edward Montesque Garlick, at your service, sir.
Adrian: Well, first thing, Garlick, is you gotta requisition a new name.

View Quote Garlick: You're not supposed to address the general saying "hiya."
Adrian: What's that, a new rule?
Garlick: No, old rule.