Edward Garlick quotes

View Quote That's Marty Lee Drywitz. He's impeccably clean. This man has cleaning products shipped in from Wisconsin. He's also one of your roommates, so if I were you, I'd think about suicide.

View Quote My whole life passed before my eyes, and it wasn't even interesting to me.

View Quote It zoomed right by, just the way they say it does. Stamp collections, pulling chickweeds from my dad's dichondra plants, arranging rakes by sizes for my mom in the garage. Even encapsulated in two seconds, my life is dull. I find that very alarming.

View Quote [To Lt Hauk] Sir? I'm begging you. Don't try to do comedy. It's not in your blood.

View Quote I live to collate, sir.