Happy Gilmore quotes

53 total quotes

Donald
Happy Gilmore
Mr. Larson
Multiple Characters
Shooter McGavin

View Quote Thank you, Doug. You know, I saw Doug playing yesterday. And I've got to tell you, this guy spends more time on the sand than David Hasselhoff.

View Quote This is Shooter's tour!

View Quote Yeah, it is about time! I mean I just couldn't get the ball in the hole! I wanted to but I just couldn't do it! [Pulls guys shirt and punches him in the face]

View Quote Yeah, why don't I go eat some hay. I can make things out of clay, or lay by the bay, I just may. Whaddya say?

View Quote you know yesterday I saw two big fat bikers having sex in the woods....how am i supposed to CHIP with that going on?!

View Quote You son of a bitch ball! Why don't you just go home?! That's your HOME! Are you too good for your home? Answer me! Suck my white ass, ball!

View Quote You will not make this putt... ya jackass!

View Quote You're gonna need a blanket and suntan lotion, cause you're never gonna get off that beach, just like the way you never got into the NHL... ya jackass!