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Announcer: ...for the past four years, male modeling has been dominated by one man and five syllables: Der-ek Zoo-land-er. [Derek slowly counts the syllables off on his fingers]
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Announcer: Oh, you hate to see something like that at an event like this; ugly protesters bothering beautiful people.
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Billy Zane:It's a walk-off, it's a walk-off.
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Brint: I knew it was a joke Meekus, I just didn't get it right away!
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David Bowie: [a judge is needed for the "walk-off"] If nobody has any objections, I believe I might be of service.
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Derek's Roommates: Orange Mocha Frappucino!
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J.P. Prewitt: (after Derek accidentally stepped on the glass dome surrounding his hand) Ya freaking idiot!!!
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J.P. Prewitt: I'm a hand model, mama. A finger jockey. We think differently than the face and body boys... we're a different breed.
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Katinka: [after throwing Matilda into the street from Mugatu's spa] I suggest you and your Kmart Jaclyn Smith Collection outfit... stay the hell away from Derek Zoolander!
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Katinka: I do not like snoopy reporter with lack of fashion sense, not one little bit.
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Larry Zoolander: Damnit Derek, I'm a coal miner, not a professional film or television actor.
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Larry Zoolander: You're dead to me boy. You're more dead to me than your dead mother.
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Matilda: [to Katinka] By the way, you were wrong about my outfit. It's the Cheryl Ladd collection and I got it at JC Penney's. On sale!
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Maury Ballstein: I've got a prostate the size of a honeydew and a head full of bad memories.
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Maury Ballstein: Watch out Tushie squeeze!