I Heart Huckabees quotes

View Quote Tommy Corn: Ah, here he comes!
Albert Markovski: Oh, boy.
Tommy Corn: The man-poet who banged France's dark lady of philosophy. The parking lot crusader of truth... who turned his back on his other like a cold-blooded gangsta.

View Quote Tommy Corn: What are you doing tomorrow?
Albert Markovski: I was thinking about chaining myself to a bulldozer. Do you want to come?
Tommy Corn: What time?
Albert Markovski: Mmm... one, one-thirty.
Tommy Corn: Sounds good. Should I bring my own chains?
Albert Markovski: We always do.

View Quote Tommy Corn:[running away from Vivian and Bernard] I want my money back!
Albert Markovski: Yeah, and if I weren't pro bono, I'd want MY money back!

View Quote Vivian Jaffe: Have you ever transcended space and time?
Albert Markovski: Yes. No. Uh...time, not space. No, I have no idea what you're talking about.

View Quote Vivian Jaffe: Why don't you just tell me what your situation is?
Albert Markovski: Look, I'm not really sure I know exactly what you guys do around here, all right?
Vivian Jaffe: Well, we'll investigate and solve your case.
Albert Markovski: How?
Vivian Jaffe: If you sign a contract we'll follow you.
Albert Markovski: You'll spy?
Vivian Jaffe: Yes.
Albert Markovski: On me?
Vivian Jaffe: Yes.
Albert Markovski: Will you be spying on me in the bathroom?
Vivian Jaffe: Yes.
Albert Markovski: In the bathroom?
Vivian Jaffe: Yes.
Albert Markovski: Why?
Vivian Jaffe: There's nothing too small. You know when police find the slightest piece of DNA and build a case on it? If we might see you floss or masturbate that could be the key to your entire reality.

View Quote [about the body bag exercise] I can't go back in there. It's all hating faces that I have to chop up with a machete!

View Quote [emotionless] These are the best tops around. Last time, last year - not so good. [suddenly fervent] But now, this is the truth!

View Quote [to Vivian Jaffe] I can't believe you guys actually exist.

View Quote Aaah, here he comes! The man poet who banged France's Dark Lady of Philosophy! The parking lot crusader of truth who turned his back on his Other like a cold-blooded gangsta.

View Quote Caterine Vauban: It is inevitable to be drawn back into human drama.

View Quote Did you see that? Shania knew who I was.

View Quote Do I benefit from getting some great P.R. For Huckabees when we need it? Absolutely. But do I care about saving the open spaces?

View Quote Everything is the same, even if it's different.

View Quote ****abees!

View Quote Honestly, I have no idea what you guys are talking about. I thought we were talking about petroleum.