Multiple Characters quotes
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USMC Colonel Sharp: MH-53 pilot, power down now! [Armed soldiers quickly surround the helicopter (Blackout)] Have your crew step out, or we will kill you! [Blackout transforms and attacks] My God...!
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Sheriff: [to Sam, annoyed] Are you eyeballing my piece, Fifty Cent? You wanna go? [leans over to Sam] Make something happen, do it. 'Cause, I promise you, [hovering right over Sam] I will bust you up.
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Miles: [to Sam about Mikaela] She's an evil jock concubine, man. Let her hitchhike.
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Little Girl: [Ironhide] Excuse me, are you the tooth fairy?
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Ratchet: [scanning Sam's body] The boy's pheromone levels suggest he wants to mate with the female.
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Starscream: I live to serve you, Lord Megatron!
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Ironhide: Sam, get to the building!
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Glen's Cousin: [being chased by police officers] I'm just the cousin, I'M JUST THE COUSIN!!! [Police officer tackles him into the swimming pool]
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Fat Guy With Camera: [when Ratchet's protoform hits the ground] This is the coolest thing I've ever seen—explosions everywhere; this is easily a hundred times cooler than Armageddon, I swear to God!!
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Kid In Car: [watching Bonecrusher and Optimus Prime fight] Cool, Mom!!
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Manny's Cousin: I'm hot! Make-up's melting! Hurts my eyes!
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Blackout: [in Cybertronian] All hail Megatron!
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Chief Warrant Officer Jorge "Fig" Figueroa: After sixteen months of this…can't wait to have a taste of home. A plate of mama's alligators etouff?.
USAF Tech Sgt. Robert Epps: You've been talking about barbecued 'gators and crickets for the past few weeks. I'm never going to your mother's house Fig, I promise you!
CWO Figueroa: Bobby, alligators are known to have the most succulent meat.
Tech Sgt. Epps: I understand.
[Figueroa goes into rapid Spanish, while Epps mimics him]
Tech Sgt. Epps: English. English, please.
Capt. William Lennox: I mean, how many times do we have to tell you? We don't speak Spanish.
CWO Figueroa: Why d'you have to ruin it for me, man? It's my heritage— [lapses back into Spanish]
Capt. Lennox: Fine…go with the Spanish.
Sergeant First Class Donnelly: Hey, remember weekends? The Sox at Fenway; a cold hot dog and a flat beer.
CWO Figueroa: Perfect day. [to Lennox] What about you, Captain? You got a perfect day?
Capt. Lennox: I just want to hold my baby girl for the first time.
[The other soldiers respond with gently-mocking "awwws" and "he's adorable"]
Capt. Lennox: Shut up!
USAF Tech Sgt. Robert Epps: You've been talking about barbecued 'gators and crickets for the past few weeks. I'm never going to your mother's house Fig, I promise you!
CWO Figueroa: Bobby, alligators are known to have the most succulent meat.
Tech Sgt. Epps: I understand.
[Figueroa goes into rapid Spanish, while Epps mimics him]
Tech Sgt. Epps: English. English, please.
Capt. William Lennox: I mean, how many times do we have to tell you? We don't speak Spanish.
CWO Figueroa: Why d'you have to ruin it for me, man? It's my heritage— [lapses back into Spanish]
Capt. Lennox: Fine…go with the Spanish.
Sergeant First Class Donnelly: Hey, remember weekends? The Sox at Fenway; a cold hot dog and a flat beer.
CWO Figueroa: Perfect day. [to Lennox] What about you, Captain? You got a perfect day?
Capt. Lennox: I just want to hold my baby girl for the first time.
[The other soldiers respond with gently-mocking "awwws" and "he's adorable"]
Capt. Lennox: Shut up!
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Ron Witwicky: I've got a little surprise for you, son. [drives towards a Porsche dealer] Yep, a little surprise.
Sam Witwicky: No, no, no, NO!! Dad! Oh, you've got to be kidding me!
Ron Witwicky: Yeah, I am. [drives past Porsche dealer] You're not getting a Porsche!
Sam Witwicky: [offended look] You think that's funny?
Ron Witwicky: Yeah, I think it's funny.
Sam Witwicky: What's wrong with you?!
Ron Witwicky: What, did you really think I'd get you a Porsche? For your first car?
Sam Witwicky: I don't wanna talk to you for the rest of the day. [Ron chuckles]
Sam Witwicky: No, no, no, NO!! Dad! Oh, you've got to be kidding me!
Ron Witwicky: Yeah, I am. [drives past Porsche dealer] You're not getting a Porsche!
Sam Witwicky: [offended look] You think that's funny?
Ron Witwicky: Yeah, I think it's funny.
Sam Witwicky: What's wrong with you?!
Ron Witwicky: What, did you really think I'd get you a Porsche? For your first car?
Sam Witwicky: I don't wanna talk to you for the rest of the day. [Ron chuckles]
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Sam Witwicky: [in a used car showroom] Okay, let me explain something to you. You ever seen The 40-Year-Old Virgin?
Ron Witwicky: Yeah...
Sam Witwicky: Well, that... [points to a car] is what it is, and this [points to another car] is the 50-year-old virgin. Do you want me to live that life?
Ron Witwicky: Yeah...
Sam Witwicky: Well, that... [points to a car] is what it is, and this [points to another car] is the 50-year-old virgin. Do you want me to live that life?
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Bobby Boliva: How can I help you, gentlemen?
Ron Witwicky: My son. Looking to buy his first car.
Bobby Boliva: [to Sam] You come to see me?
Sam Witwicky: [quietly] I had to.
Bobby Boliva: That practically makes us family. Uncle Bobby B, baby. [shakes hands with Sam] Uncle Bobby B. [smiles]
Ron Witwicky: My son. Looking to buy his first car.
Bobby Boliva: [to Sam] You come to see me?
Sam Witwicky: [quietly] I had to.
Bobby Boliva: That practically makes us family. Uncle Bobby B, baby. [shakes hands with Sam] Uncle Bobby B. [smiles]
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[Captain Lennox is trying to call the Pentagon while his men fight Scorponok]
Capt. Lennox: NO, I DON'T HAVE A CREDIT CARD!!
International Operator: [bored] Sir, the attitude isn't going to speed things up any bit at all. I'm going to ask you to speak into the mouthpiece very clearly.
Capt. Lennox: I'm in the middle of a WAR! This is friggin' ridiculous!! [Runs over to Epps] I need a credit card! Epps, where's your wallet?
Tech Sgt. Epps: Pocket!!
Capt. Lennox: Which pocket?!
Tech Sgt. Epps: MY BACK POCKET!!!
Capt. Lennox: You've got ten back pockets!!!
Tech Sgt. Epps: LEFT CHEEK!!! LEFT CHEEK!!! LEFT CHEEK!!!
. . .
Capt. Lennox: Okay, it's a Visa.
International Operator: Also, sir, have you heard about our Premium Plus full service call package?
Capt. Lennox: NO, I DON'T WANT A PREMIUM PACKAGE!!! Epps, Pentagon!
Capt. Lennox: NO, I DON'T HAVE A CREDIT CARD!!
International Operator: [bored] Sir, the attitude isn't going to speed things up any bit at all. I'm going to ask you to speak into the mouthpiece very clearly.
Capt. Lennox: I'm in the middle of a WAR! This is friggin' ridiculous!! [Runs over to Epps] I need a credit card! Epps, where's your wallet?
Tech Sgt. Epps: Pocket!!
Capt. Lennox: Which pocket?!
Tech Sgt. Epps: MY BACK POCKET!!!
Capt. Lennox: You've got ten back pockets!!!
Tech Sgt. Epps: LEFT CHEEK!!! LEFT CHEEK!!! LEFT CHEEK!!!
. . .
Capt. Lennox: Okay, it's a Visa.
International Operator: Also, sir, have you heard about our Premium Plus full service call package?
Capt. Lennox: NO, I DON'T WANT A PREMIUM PACKAGE!!! Epps, Pentagon!
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Trent: So, what are you guys doing here?
Sam Witwkcky: [looking at the tree Miles climbing] We're here to climb this tree.
Trent: I can see, it looks... it looks fun. You know, I thought I recognized you. You tried out for the football team last year, right?
Sam Witwicky: Oh, no, no, that... That wasn't like a real try-out. I was researching a book I was writing?
Trent: Oh, yeah?
Sam Witwicky: Yeah!
Trent: Yeah? What's it about? Sucking at sports?
Sam Witwicky: [laughs a little] No, it's about the link between brain damage and football.
[Trent looks really angry, while Mikaela hides a smile]
Sam Witwicky: [nods head] No, it's a good book, your friends will love it. You know, it's got mazes in it, you know, little coloring areas, sections, pop-up pictures... it's a lot of fun.
Trent: That's funny.
Sam Witwkcky: [looking at the tree Miles climbing] We're here to climb this tree.
Trent: I can see, it looks... it looks fun. You know, I thought I recognized you. You tried out for the football team last year, right?
Sam Witwicky: Oh, no, no, that... That wasn't like a real try-out. I was researching a book I was writing?
Trent: Oh, yeah?
Sam Witwicky: Yeah!
Trent: Yeah? What's it about? Sucking at sports?
Sam Witwicky: [laughs a little] No, it's about the link between brain damage and football.
[Trent looks really angry, while Mikaela hides a smile]
Sam Witwicky: [nods head] No, it's a good book, your friends will love it. You know, it's got mazes in it, you know, little coloring areas, sections, pop-up pictures... it's a lot of fun.
Trent: That's funny.
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[Sam is courting Mikaela]
Sam Witwicky: I hope I didn't get you stranded or anything. You sure? So listen, I was wondering if I could ride you home. I mean, give you a ride home in my car, to your house. [Mikaela enters the car]
Mikaela Banes: [to herself] ...I can't believe that I'm here right now.
Sam Witwicky: You can duck down if you want. I mean, it won't hurt my feelings.
Mikaela Banes: No, no, it's not you. It's just that I'm here in this situation... I'm always in the same situation, and I don't know... I just have a weakness for hot guys with tight abs and really big arms.
Sam Witwicky: [confused] Big arms?
Sam Witwicky: I hope I didn't get you stranded or anything. You sure? So listen, I was wondering if I could ride you home. I mean, give you a ride home in my car, to your house. [Mikaela enters the car]
Mikaela Banes: [to herself] ...I can't believe that I'm here right now.
Sam Witwicky: You can duck down if you want. I mean, it won't hurt my feelings.
Mikaela Banes: No, no, it's not you. It's just that I'm here in this situation... I'm always in the same situation, and I don't know... I just have a weakness for hot guys with tight abs and really big arms.
Sam Witwicky: [confused] Big arms?
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Mikaela Banes: Whoa, nice headers. You've got a high-rise double-pump carburetor. That's... that's pretty impressive, Sam.
Sam Witwicky: Double-pump?
Mikaela Banes: It squirts the fuel in so you can go faster.
Sam Witwicky: Oh... I like to go faster.
Mikaela Banes: And your distributor cap's a little loose.
Sam Witwicky: Yeah? How'd you know that?
Mikaela Banes: My dad, he was a real grease monkey. He taught me all about this. I could take it all apart, clean it, and then put it back together.
Sam Witwicky: That's weird; I just wouldn't peg you for mechanical.
Mikaela Banes: Well, you know, I don't really broadcast it. Guys don't like it when you know more about cars than they do. Especially not Trent; he hates it. [winks at Sam]
Sam Witwicky: Yeah, I'm cool with, you know, females working on my engine. I prefer it actually.
Sam Witwicky: Double-pump?
Mikaela Banes: It squirts the fuel in so you can go faster.
Sam Witwicky: Oh... I like to go faster.
Mikaela Banes: And your distributor cap's a little loose.
Sam Witwicky: Yeah? How'd you know that?
Mikaela Banes: My dad, he was a real grease monkey. He taught me all about this. I could take it all apart, clean it, and then put it back together.
Sam Witwicky: That's weird; I just wouldn't peg you for mechanical.
Mikaela Banes: Well, you know, I don't really broadcast it. Guys don't like it when you know more about cars than they do. Especially not Trent; he hates it. [winks at Sam]
Sam Witwicky: Yeah, I'm cool with, you know, females working on my engine. I prefer it actually.
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Sam Witwicky: Look, I can't be any clearer than how crystal clear I am being. It just stood up.
Sheriff: It just stood up? Wow, that's really neat. [hands Sam a container and a tissue] Okay, cheify, time to filler up. And no drippy-drippy. What're you rolling? Whippets, goofballs, a little wowie sauce with the boys.
Sam Witwicky: No, I'm not on any drugs.
Sheriff: What's these? [shows Sam his dog's pain pills] Found it in your pocket, "Mojo". Is this what the kids are doing now? A little bit of Mojo.
Sam Witwicky: Those are my dog's pain pills.
Ron Witwicky: You know, a Chihuahua. A little...
Sheriff: [getting annoyed, rolls his eyes] What was that?
Sam Witwicky: Hmm?
Sheriff: You eyeballing my piece, Fifty Cent? You wanna go? [leans over to Sam] Make something happen, do it. 'Cause, I promise you, [hovering right over Sam] I will bust you up.
Sam Witwicky: [whispers] Are you on drugs?
Sheriff: It just stood up? Wow, that's really neat. [hands Sam a container and a tissue] Okay, cheify, time to filler up. And no drippy-drippy. What're you rolling? Whippets, goofballs, a little wowie sauce with the boys.
Sam Witwicky: No, I'm not on any drugs.
Sheriff: What's these? [shows Sam his dog's pain pills] Found it in your pocket, "Mojo". Is this what the kids are doing now? A little bit of Mojo.
Sam Witwicky: Those are my dog's pain pills.
Ron Witwicky: You know, a Chihuahua. A little...
Sheriff: [getting annoyed, rolls his eyes] What was that?
Sam Witwicky: Hmm?
Sheriff: You eyeballing my piece, Fifty Cent? You wanna go? [leans over to Sam] Make something happen, do it. 'Cause, I promise you, [hovering right over Sam] I will bust you up.
Sam Witwicky: [whispers] Are you on drugs?
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[Sam has flipped over his mother's bike]
Mikaela Banes: That was, uh…that was really awesome.
Sam Witwicky: Well...it felt awesome.
Mikaela Banes: Are you okay?
Sam Witwicky: No, I'm not okay, all right? I'm losin' my mind a little bit. Gettin' chased by my car right now, gotta go!
Mikaela Banes: That was, uh…that was really awesome.
Sam Witwicky: Well...it felt awesome.
Mikaela Banes: Are you okay?
Sam Witwicky: No, I'm not okay, all right? I'm losin' my mind a little bit. Gettin' chased by my car right now, gotta go!
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[Barricade transforms right in front of Sam]
Sam Witwicky: Oh God, NO!!! [Barricade chases him] Oh shit, oh shit, oh God, OH SHIT!!! It's a bad dream!
Barricade: [quickly and ferociously] Are you username: LadiesMan217?!
Sam Witwicky: I don't know what you're talking about!
Barricade: ARE YOU USERNAME: LADIESMAN217?!!
Sam Witwicky: Yeah.
Barricade: Where is the eBay Item 21153?!
Sam Witwicky: What?
Barricade: WHERE ARE THE GLASSES?!!
Sam Witwicky: Oh God, NO!!! [Barricade chases him] Oh shit, oh shit, oh God, OH SHIT!!! It's a bad dream!
Barricade: [quickly and ferociously] Are you username: LadiesMan217?!
Sam Witwicky: I don't know what you're talking about!
Barricade: ARE YOU USERNAME: LADIESMAN217?!!
Sam Witwicky: Yeah.
Barricade: Where is the eBay Item 21153?!
Sam Witwicky: What?
Barricade: WHERE ARE THE GLASSES?!!
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Sam Witwicky: [about Bumblebee] I don't think it wants to hurt us. He would've done that already.
Mikaela Banes: Really? Well, do you speak robot? Because they just had, like, a giant droid death match.
Sam Witwicky: [gets closer to Bumblebee] I think it wants something from me.
Mikaela Banes: What?
Sam Witwicky: Well 'cause the other one was talking about my eBay page.
Mikaela Banes: You are the strangest boy I have ever met.
Sam Witwicky: [looking up at Bumblebee] Can you talk?
Bumblebee: [through his radio] XM Satellite Radio... Digital cable brings you... Columbia Broadcasting System.
Sam Witwicky: You can... you can talk through the radio?
Bumblebee: [clapping his hands] Thank you, you're beautiful. You're wonderful, you're wonderful.
Sam Witwicky: So, what was that last night? What was that?
Bumblebee: [pointing skywards] Message from Starfleet, Captain... Throughout the innate vastness of space... Angels rain down like visitors from heaven! Hallelujah!
Mikaela Banes: Visitors from heaven... What? What are you, like, an alien or something?
[Bumblebee points a finger at her and nods, and transforms into a 1976 Camero]
Bumblebee: [through his radio] Any more questions you want to ask?
Sam Witwicky: He wants us to get in the car.
Mikaela Banes: [laughing nervously] And go where?
Sam Witwicky: Fifty years from now, when you're looking back at your life, don't you want to be able to say you had the guts to get in the car?
Mikaela Banes: Really? Well, do you speak robot? Because they just had, like, a giant droid death match.
Sam Witwicky: [gets closer to Bumblebee] I think it wants something from me.
Mikaela Banes: What?
Sam Witwicky: Well 'cause the other one was talking about my eBay page.
Mikaela Banes: You are the strangest boy I have ever met.
Sam Witwicky: [looking up at Bumblebee] Can you talk?
Bumblebee: [through his radio] XM Satellite Radio... Digital cable brings you... Columbia Broadcasting System.
Sam Witwicky: You can... you can talk through the radio?
Bumblebee: [clapping his hands] Thank you, you're beautiful. You're wonderful, you're wonderful.
Sam Witwicky: So, what was that last night? What was that?
Bumblebee: [pointing skywards] Message from Starfleet, Captain... Throughout the innate vastness of space... Angels rain down like visitors from heaven! Hallelujah!
Mikaela Banes: Visitors from heaven... What? What are you, like, an alien or something?
[Bumblebee points a finger at her and nods, and transforms into a 1976 Camero]
Bumblebee: [through his radio] Any more questions you want to ask?
Sam Witwicky: He wants us to get in the car.
Mikaela Banes: [laughing nervously] And go where?
Sam Witwicky: Fifty years from now, when you're looking back at your life, don't you want to be able to say you had the guts to get in the car?
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[Bumblebee is driving Sam and Mikaela through a tunnel]
Mikaela Banes: This car's a pretty good driver.
Sam Witwicky: Why don't you go sit in that seat there? [motions to the driver's seat]
Mikaela Banes: I'm not gonna sit in that seat, he's driving.
Sam Witwicky: Yeah. You're right. You know, maybe you should sit on my lap.
Mikaela Banes: Why?
Sam Witwicky: Well-I-I have the only seatbelt here. You know, safety first.
Mikaela Banes: Yeah, alright. [climbs onto Sam's lap]
Sam Witwicky: See? That's better.
Mikaela Banes: You know, that seat belt thing was a pretty smooth move.
Mikaela Banes: This car's a pretty good driver.
Sam Witwicky: Why don't you go sit in that seat there? [motions to the driver's seat]
Mikaela Banes: I'm not gonna sit in that seat, he's driving.
Sam Witwicky: Yeah. You're right. You know, maybe you should sit on my lap.
Mikaela Banes: Why?
Sam Witwicky: Well-I-I have the only seatbelt here. You know, safety first.
Mikaela Banes: Yeah, alright. [climbs onto Sam's lap]
Sam Witwicky: See? That's better.
Mikaela Banes: You know, that seat belt thing was a pretty smooth move.
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[The Autobots meet Sam and Mikaela in an alley]
Optimus Prime: Are you Samuel James Witwicky, descendant of Archibald Witwicky?
Mikaela Banes: [stunned] They know your name!
Sam Witwicky: Yeah.
Optimus Prime: My name is Optimus Prime. We are Autonomous Robotic Organisms from the planet Cybetron.
Ratchet: But you can call us "Autobots" for short.
Sam Witwicky: Autobots.
Jazz: What's crackin', little bitches? [does a somersault]
Optimus Prime: My first lieutenant. Designation: Jazz.
Jazz: This looks like a cool place to kick it! [jumps onto a car behind him as if it were a chair]
Sam Witwicky: What is that? How did he learn to talk like that?
Optimus Prime: We've learned Earth's languages through the World Wide Web. [points to Ironhide] My weapons specialist, Ironhide.
Ironhide: [brandishing his weapons] You feeling lucky, punk?
Optimus Prime: Easy, Ironhide.
Ironhide: Just kidding, I just wanted to show him my cannons.
Optimus Prime: Our medical officer, Ratchet.
Ratchet: [sniffing] The boy's pheromone levels suggest he wants to mate with the female.
[Mikaela scratches her head in embarassment - Sam whistles]
Optimus Prime: You already know your guardian, Bumblebee.
Bumblebee: [does a little dance] Check to the rep/Yep, second to none.
Sam Witwicky: Bumblebee, right? You're my guardian, huh? [Bumblebee nods]
Ratchet: His vocal processors were damaged in battle. I'm still working on them.
Mikaela Banes: Why are you here?
Optimus Prime: We are here looking for the All Spark, and we must find it before Megatron.
Sam Witwicky: Mega-what?
Optimus Prime: [produces a hologram of Cybertron for Sam and Mikaela to see] Our planet was once a powerful empire, peaceful and just, until we were betrayed by Megatron, leader of the Decepticons. All who defied them were destroyed. Our war finally consumed the planet, and the Allspark was lost to the stars. Megatron followed it to Earth, where Captain Witwicky found him.
Sam Witwicky: My grandfather...?
Optimus Prime: It was an accident that intertwined our fates. [flashbacks to Archibald's discovery of Megatron in the ice] Megatron crash-landed before he could retreive the Cube. He accidentally activated his navigation system. The coordinates to the Cube's location on Earth were inprinted on his glasses.
Sam Witwicky: How did you know about his glasses?
Optimus Prime: eBay.
Sam Witwicky: eBay...
Ratchet: If the Decepticons find the Allspark, they'll use its power to transform Earth's machines, and build a new army.
Optimus Prime: And the human race will be extinguished. Sam Witwicky, you hold the key to Earth's survival.
Mikaela Banes: [to Sam] Please tell me you have those glasses.
Optimus Prime: Are you Samuel James Witwicky, descendant of Archibald Witwicky?
Mikaela Banes: [stunned] They know your name!
Sam Witwicky: Yeah.
Optimus Prime: My name is Optimus Prime. We are Autonomous Robotic Organisms from the planet Cybetron.
Ratchet: But you can call us "Autobots" for short.
Sam Witwicky: Autobots.
Jazz: What's crackin', little bitches? [does a somersault]
Optimus Prime: My first lieutenant. Designation: Jazz.
Jazz: This looks like a cool place to kick it! [jumps onto a car behind him as if it were a chair]
Sam Witwicky: What is that? How did he learn to talk like that?
Optimus Prime: We've learned Earth's languages through the World Wide Web. [points to Ironhide] My weapons specialist, Ironhide.
Ironhide: [brandishing his weapons] You feeling lucky, punk?
Optimus Prime: Easy, Ironhide.
Ironhide: Just kidding, I just wanted to show him my cannons.
Optimus Prime: Our medical officer, Ratchet.
Ratchet: [sniffing] The boy's pheromone levels suggest he wants to mate with the female.
[Mikaela scratches her head in embarassment - Sam whistles]
Optimus Prime: You already know your guardian, Bumblebee.
Bumblebee: [does a little dance] Check to the rep/Yep, second to none.
Sam Witwicky: Bumblebee, right? You're my guardian, huh? [Bumblebee nods]
Ratchet: His vocal processors were damaged in battle. I'm still working on them.
Mikaela Banes: Why are you here?
Optimus Prime: We are here looking for the All Spark, and we must find it before Megatron.
Sam Witwicky: Mega-what?
Optimus Prime: [produces a hologram of Cybertron for Sam and Mikaela to see] Our planet was once a powerful empire, peaceful and just, until we were betrayed by Megatron, leader of the Decepticons. All who defied them were destroyed. Our war finally consumed the planet, and the Allspark was lost to the stars. Megatron followed it to Earth, where Captain Witwicky found him.
Sam Witwicky: My grandfather...?
Optimus Prime: It was an accident that intertwined our fates. [flashbacks to Archibald's discovery of Megatron in the ice] Megatron crash-landed before he could retreive the Cube. He accidentally activated his navigation system. The coordinates to the Cube's location on Earth were inprinted on his glasses.
Sam Witwicky: How did you know about his glasses?
Optimus Prime: eBay.
Sam Witwicky: eBay...
Ratchet: If the Decepticons find the Allspark, they'll use its power to transform Earth's machines, and build a new army.
Optimus Prime: And the human race will be extinguished. Sam Witwicky, you hold the key to Earth's survival.
Mikaela Banes: [to Sam] Please tell me you have those glasses.
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[Glen has just eaten a whole plateful of donuts]
Glen Whitmann: Ok, Maggie, look. Let me break it down to you how it's going to happen. They're going to come through that door, be good-cop, bad-cop. Don't fall for that, all right? That's why I ate their food. See, they put the plate of donuts out here to test your guilt. If you don't touch it, you're guilty. I ate the whole plate—the whole plate, okay? So me and you, they walk through that door, you don't say nothing. [door opens and agents come in and surround them; as soon an agent drops a folder of papers on the folder, Glen jumps up and points to Maggie] SHE DID IT!!! She did it, she's the one you want! I was just sitting at home, watching cartoons and playing video games with my cousin, then she came in there!
Maggie Madsen: [in anger] Glen, you freak!
Glen Whitmann: Hey, I am not going to jail for you, or anybody else! I have done nothing bad my entire life! Hey man, I’m still a virgin! Okay, so I downloaded a couple of thousand songs off the internet. Who hasn't? Who hasn't?!
Maggie Madsen: Glen, shut up!
Glen Whitmann: No, you shut up! Don't talk to me! Don't talk to me, criminal! [suddenly clutches his stomach] Ooh... sugar rush...
Glen Whitmann: Ok, Maggie, look. Let me break it down to you how it's going to happen. They're going to come through that door, be good-cop, bad-cop. Don't fall for that, all right? That's why I ate their food. See, they put the plate of donuts out here to test your guilt. If you don't touch it, you're guilty. I ate the whole plate—the whole plate, okay? So me and you, they walk through that door, you don't say nothing. [door opens and agents come in and surround them; as soon an agent drops a folder of papers on the folder, Glen jumps up and points to Maggie] SHE DID IT!!! She did it, she's the one you want! I was just sitting at home, watching cartoons and playing video games with my cousin, then she came in there!
Maggie Madsen: [in anger] Glen, you freak!
Glen Whitmann: Hey, I am not going to jail for you, or anybody else! I have done nothing bad my entire life! Hey man, I’m still a virgin! Okay, so I downloaded a couple of thousand songs off the internet. Who hasn't? Who hasn't?!
Maggie Madsen: Glen, shut up!
Glen Whitmann: No, you shut up! Don't talk to me! Don't talk to me, criminal! [suddenly clutches his stomach] Ooh... sugar rush...
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[Mojo, Sam's dog, has just peed on Ironhide's foot]
Sam Witwicky: Mojo! Mojo! Off the robot!
Ironhide: You have a rodent infestation. Shall I terminate it?
Sam Witwicky: No! No! This is a Chihuahua. We all love Chihuahuas.
Ironhide: He's leaked lubricant all over my foot!
Sam Witwicky: He—you mean he peed on you? [to Mojo] Bad Mojo! Bad Mojo!
Ironhide: Bad Mojo!
Sam Witwicky: I'm sorry, it's a male dominance thing, that's all...
Ironhide: Hugghh... My foot's gonna rust.
Sam Witwicky: Mojo! Mojo! Off the robot!
Ironhide: You have a rodent infestation. Shall I terminate it?
Sam Witwicky: No! No! This is a Chihuahua. We all love Chihuahuas.
Ironhide: He's leaked lubricant all over my foot!
Sam Witwicky: He—you mean he peed on you? [to Mojo] Bad Mojo! Bad Mojo!
Ironhide: Bad Mojo!
Sam Witwicky: I'm sorry, it's a male dominance thing, that's all...
Ironhide: Hugghh... My foot's gonna rust.
View Quote
[Sam asks the Autobots to keep quiet]
Optimus Prime: Autobots, fall back.
[The Autobots move away from the house]
Ratchet: Move!
Ironhide: Get away!
Optimus Prime: What's the matter with you?! Can't you be quiet? He wants us to be quiet!
Ratchet: [runs into the powerline] OW!! [siren goes off, trips and falls; the house starts shaking]
Ron Witwicky: Earthquake! Move, move, move, MOVE!! Earthquake! Judy, get under the table! Move it! Duck and cover, right now!
Judy Witwicty: [not moving] How did you get over there so fast??
Ratchet: [slightly giddy] Wow, that was tingly! [tries to get up, strains] You got to try that!
Ironhide: [sarcastically] Yeah, that looks fun.
Optimus Prime: Autobots, fall back.
[The Autobots move away from the house]
Ratchet: Move!
Ironhide: Get away!
Optimus Prime: What's the matter with you?! Can't you be quiet? He wants us to be quiet!
Ratchet: [runs into the powerline] OW!! [siren goes off, trips and falls; the house starts shaking]
Ron Witwicky: Earthquake! Move, move, move, MOVE!! Earthquake! Judy, get under the table! Move it! Duck and cover, right now!
Judy Witwicty: [not moving] How did you get over there so fast??
Ratchet: [slightly giddy] Wow, that was tingly! [tries to get up, strains] You got to try that!
Ironhide: [sarcastically] Yeah, that looks fun.
View Quote
[After his parents enter his bedroom, Sam is desperately protesting; the Autobots are secretly outside, and Mikaela is hiding in the room]
Judy Witwicky: Oh, for Pete's sakes! You are so defensive! Were you... masturbating?
Ron Witwicky: Judy.
Sam Witwicky: [frantic] Was I master... No, Mom!
Ron Witwicky: Zip it, okay?
Judy Witwicky: It's okay.
Sam Witwicky: No, I don't masturbate!
Ron Witwicky: That's not something for you to bring up.
Judy Witwicky: It's okay.
Ron Witwicky: That's a father-and-son thing, okay?
Sam Witwicky: [amazed] Father-and-son thing.
Judy Witwicky: I mean, you don't have to call it that word if it makes you uncomfortable. You can call it "Sam's happy time".
Sam Witwicky: Happy time?
Judy Witwicky: Or "My special alone time with myself".
Ron Witwicky: Judy, stop.
Sam Witwicky: [final plea] Mom, you can't come in and...
Judy Witwicky: I'm sorry, it's just been a weird night; I've had a little too much to drink.
Judy Witwicky: Oh, for Pete's sakes! You are so defensive! Were you... masturbating?
Ron Witwicky: Judy.
Sam Witwicky: [frantic] Was I master... No, Mom!
Ron Witwicky: Zip it, okay?
Judy Witwicky: It's okay.
Sam Witwicky: No, I don't masturbate!
Ron Witwicky: That's not something for you to bring up.
Judy Witwicky: It's okay.
Ron Witwicky: That's a father-and-son thing, okay?
Sam Witwicky: [amazed] Father-and-son thing.
Judy Witwicky: I mean, you don't have to call it that word if it makes you uncomfortable. You can call it "Sam's happy time".
Sam Witwicky: Happy time?
Judy Witwicky: Or "My special alone time with myself".
Ron Witwicky: Judy, stop.
Sam Witwicky: [final plea] Mom, you can't come in and...
Judy Witwicky: I'm sorry, it's just been a weird night; I've had a little too much to drink.
View Quote
[Sam and Mikaela's search for the glasses are continually interrupted by Sam's parents]
Ironhide: [brandishing his arm-cannons] The parents are very irritating.
Ratchet: [trying to calm him] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!
Ironhide: Can I take them out?
Optimus Prime: Ironhide, you know we don't harm humans! What is with you?!
Ironhide: Well, I'm just saying, we could... it's an option.
Ironhide: [brandishing his arm-cannons] The parents are very irritating.
Ratchet: [trying to calm him] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!
Ironhide: Can I take them out?
Optimus Prime: Ironhide, you know we don't harm humans! What is with you?!
Ironhide: Well, I'm just saying, we could... it's an option.
View Quote
Agent Reggie Simmons: Ronald Wikity?
Ron Witwicky: It's "Witwicky". Who are you?
Agent Simmons: [shows badge] We're the government. Sector 7.
Ron Witwicky: Never heard of it.
Agent Simmons: Never will. Your son is the great-grandson of Archibald Wikity, is he not?
Ron Witwicky: It's "Witwicky"!
Agent Simmons: [steps through the door] May we enter the premises, sir?
Judy Witwicky: Ron, there's guys all over the front yard!
Ron Witwicky: What the heck is going on here?!
Agent Simmons: Your son filed a stolen car report last night. We think he may be involved in a National Security matter.
Ron Witwicky: National Security?
Agent Simmons: That's right, National Security.
Ron Witwicky: It's "Witwicky". Who are you?
Agent Simmons: [shows badge] We're the government. Sector 7.
Ron Witwicky: Never heard of it.
Agent Simmons: Never will. Your son is the great-grandson of Archibald Wikity, is he not?
Ron Witwicky: It's "Witwicky"!
Agent Simmons: [steps through the door] May we enter the premises, sir?
Judy Witwicky: Ron, there's guys all over the front yard!
Ron Witwicky: What the heck is going on here?!
Agent Simmons: Your son filed a stolen car report last night. We think he may be involved in a National Security matter.
Ron Witwicky: National Security?
Agent Simmons: That's right, National Security.
View Quote
[Agent Simmons is interrogating Sam and Mikaela in a car]
Agent Simmons: Hey, you see this? [shows them his badge] This is a "do whatever I want and get away with it" badge. I'm gonna lock you up forever.
Mikaela Banes: Oh God... you know what? Don't listen to him. He's just pissy because he's gotta get back to guarding the Mall.
Agent Simmons: You in the training bra. Do not test me, especially with your daddy's parole coming up.
Sam Witwicky: What? Parole?!
Mikaela Banes: It's nothing.
Agent Simmons: A grand theft auto? That ain't nothing?
Mikaela Banes: You know those cars my dad used to teach me to fix? Well, they... They weren't always his.
Sam Witwicky: You stole cars?!
Mikaela Banes: Well, we couldn't always afford a babysitter, so he'd sometimes had to bring me along.
Agent Simmons: She's got her own juvy record to prove it! She's a criminal. And criminals are hot! Now it'd be a real shame if he rots in jail for the rest of his natural life. It is time to talk!
[The car crashes into an unknown object and is suddenly lifted from the ground, then falls back down as the roof is ripped off]
Sam Witwicky: You A-holes are in trouble now. Gentlemen, I want to introduce you to my friend, Optimus Prime.
Optimus Prime: Taking the children was a bad move. Autobots relieve them of their weapons!
[The agents point their weapons at Prime, while the Autobots jump down from a nearby bridge and reveal their weapons]
Ironhide: [brandishing his cannons] Freeze!!
Agent Simmons: Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Jazz: Give me those! [uses his magnetic hands to disarm the agents]
[Optimus Prime leans in to face Simmons and the agents]
Agent Simmons: [staring at Prime] Hi there.
Optimus Prime: You don't seem afraid. Are you not surprised to see us?
Agent Simmons: Look there are—S7 protocols, okay? I'm not authorized to communicate with you... except to tell you that I cannot communicate with—you
Optimus Prime: [sternly] Get out of the car.
Agent Simmons: Uh...me? You want me to...
Optimus Prime: NOW!!!
Agent Simmons: All right, I'm getting out.
Agent Simmons: Hey, you see this? [shows them his badge] This is a "do whatever I want and get away with it" badge. I'm gonna lock you up forever.
Mikaela Banes: Oh God... you know what? Don't listen to him. He's just pissy because he's gotta get back to guarding the Mall.
Agent Simmons: You in the training bra. Do not test me, especially with your daddy's parole coming up.
Sam Witwicky: What? Parole?!
Mikaela Banes: It's nothing.
Agent Simmons: A grand theft auto? That ain't nothing?
Mikaela Banes: You know those cars my dad used to teach me to fix? Well, they... They weren't always his.
Sam Witwicky: You stole cars?!
Mikaela Banes: Well, we couldn't always afford a babysitter, so he'd sometimes had to bring me along.
Agent Simmons: She's got her own juvy record to prove it! She's a criminal. And criminals are hot! Now it'd be a real shame if he rots in jail for the rest of his natural life. It is time to talk!
[The car crashes into an unknown object and is suddenly lifted from the ground, then falls back down as the roof is ripped off]
Sam Witwicky: You A-holes are in trouble now. Gentlemen, I want to introduce you to my friend, Optimus Prime.
Optimus Prime: Taking the children was a bad move. Autobots relieve them of their weapons!
[The agents point their weapons at Prime, while the Autobots jump down from a nearby bridge and reveal their weapons]
Ironhide: [brandishing his cannons] Freeze!!
Agent Simmons: Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Jazz: Give me those! [uses his magnetic hands to disarm the agents]
[Optimus Prime leans in to face Simmons and the agents]
Agent Simmons: [staring at Prime] Hi there.
Optimus Prime: You don't seem afraid. Are you not surprised to see us?
Agent Simmons: Look there are—S7 protocols, okay? I'm not authorized to communicate with you... except to tell you that I cannot communicate with—you
Optimus Prime: [sternly] Get out of the car.
Agent Simmons: Uh...me? You want me to...
Optimus Prime: NOW!!!
Agent Simmons: All right, I'm getting out.
View Quote
Sam Witwicky: What is Sector 7? Answer me!
Agent Simmons: I'm the one who asks questions around here. Not you, young man!
Mikaela Banes: How did you know about the aliens?
Sam Witwicky: Where did you take my parents?
Agent Simmons: I am not at liberty to discuss this. [Sam takes his ID] Hey, you touch me, that's a federal offense.
Sam Witwicky: "Do whatever you want and get away with it badge", right?
Agent Simmons: Great, brave now all of a sudden with all of your alien friends here.
Sam Witwicky: Where's Sector 7?!
Agent Simmons: [sneers] Wouldn't you like to know?
[Behind him, Bumblebee pops an oil filter and leaks lubricant on Simmons]
Agent Simmons: HEY!!
Optimus Prime: Bumblebee, stop lubricating the man!
Agent Simmons: Get that thing to stop, huh?!
Agent Simmons: I'm the one who asks questions around here. Not you, young man!
Mikaela Banes: How did you know about the aliens?
Sam Witwicky: Where did you take my parents?
Agent Simmons: I am not at liberty to discuss this. [Sam takes his ID] Hey, you touch me, that's a federal offense.
Sam Witwicky: "Do whatever you want and get away with it badge", right?
Agent Simmons: Great, brave now all of a sudden with all of your alien friends here.
Sam Witwicky: Where's Sector 7?!
Agent Simmons: [sneers] Wouldn't you like to know?
[Behind him, Bumblebee pops an oil filter and leaks lubricant on Simmons]
Agent Simmons: HEY!!
Optimus Prime: Bumblebee, stop lubricating the man!
Agent Simmons: Get that thing to stop, huh?!
View Quote
Jazz: Hang back, let me check it out. Optimus, are we just gonna stand here and do nothing?
Optimus Prime: There's no way to free Bumblebee with harming the humans.
Jazz: But it's not right.
Optimus Prime: Let them leave. [recovers Archibald's glasses]
Optimus Prime: There's no way to free Bumblebee with harming the humans.
Jazz: But it's not right.
Optimus Prime: Let them leave. [recovers Archibald's glasses]
View Quote
[Keller enters the FBI interrogation room]
Maggie Madsen: What's going on?
John Keller: You're coming with me. You're going to be my advisor.
Glen Whitmann: Me too?
John Keller: Who's this?
Maggie Madsen: He's... my advisor.
John Keller: He comes too.
Maggie Madsen: What's going on?
John Keller: You're coming with me. You're going to be my advisor.
Glen Whitmann: Me too?
John Keller: Who's this?
Maggie Madsen: He's... my advisor.
John Keller: He comes too.
View Quote
[Sam and Mikaela are being transported in the same helicopter as Maggie and Glen]
Sam Witwicky: So...
Maggie Madsen: What did they get you for?
Sam Witwicky: I bought a car. Turned out to be an alien robot.
Glen Whitmann: [is stunned] Wow...!
Sam Witwicky: Who knew?
Sam Witwicky: So...
Maggie Madsen: What did they get you for?
Sam Witwicky: I bought a car. Turned out to be an alien robot.
Glen Whitmann: [is stunned] Wow...!
Sam Witwicky: Who knew?
View Quote
[The Autobots discuss their next move atop the Griffith Observatory]
Optimus Prime: [holding Archibald's glasses] Please... let this work.
Jazz: Fire it up, Optimus.
Optimus Prime: [creates a hologram of the Earth from the glasses] The code... the code on these glasses indicates the Allspark is 230 miles from here.
Ratchet: I sense the Decepticons are getting ready to mobilize.
Ironhide: They must know it's here as well...
Jazz: What about Bumblebee? We can't just leave him to die! [Bumblebee is tortuted by the Sector 7 agents] Or become some human experiment!
Optimus Prime: He'll die in vain if we don't accomplish out mission. Bumblebee is a brave soldier; this is what he would want.
Ironhide: Why are we fighting to save the humans? They're a primitive and violent race.
Optimus Prime: Were we so different? They are a young species; they have much to learn... but I've seen goodness in them. [Sector 7 vehicles pull up, Sam and Mikaela disembark] Freedom is the right of all sentient beings... you all know there is only one way to end this war. We must destroy the Cube. If all else fails, [opens his chest compartment] I will unite it with the spark in my chest.
Ratchet: That's suicide! The Cube is raw power, it could destroy you both!
Optimus Prime: A neccesary sacrifice to bring peace to this planet. We cannot let the humans pay for our mistakes. It's been an honor serving with you all. Autobots, roll out!
Jazz: We rolling!
Optimus Prime: [holding Archibald's glasses] Please... let this work.
Jazz: Fire it up, Optimus.
Optimus Prime: [creates a hologram of the Earth from the glasses] The code... the code on these glasses indicates the Allspark is 230 miles from here.
Ratchet: I sense the Decepticons are getting ready to mobilize.
Ironhide: They must know it's here as well...
Jazz: What about Bumblebee? We can't just leave him to die! [Bumblebee is tortuted by the Sector 7 agents] Or become some human experiment!
Optimus Prime: He'll die in vain if we don't accomplish out mission. Bumblebee is a brave soldier; this is what he would want.
Ironhide: Why are we fighting to save the humans? They're a primitive and violent race.
Optimus Prime: Were we so different? They are a young species; they have much to learn... but I've seen goodness in them. [Sector 7 vehicles pull up, Sam and Mikaela disembark] Freedom is the right of all sentient beings... you all know there is only one way to end this war. We must destroy the Cube. If all else fails, [opens his chest compartment] I will unite it with the spark in my chest.
Ratchet: That's suicide! The Cube is raw power, it could destroy you both!
Optimus Prime: A neccesary sacrifice to bring peace to this planet. We cannot let the humans pay for our mistakes. It's been an honor serving with you all. Autobots, roll out!
Jazz: We rolling!
View Quote
Agent Simmons: Hey kid, I think we got off to a bad start, huh? You must be hungry. You want a latte, ho-ho, double vente machiatto...
Sam Witwicky: Where's my car?
Tom Banachek: Son, I need you to listen to me very carefully. People can die here. We need to know everything you know and we need to know it now.
Sam Witwicky: Okay, but first I want my car, my parents - maybe you could write that down. Oh, and [looks at Mikaela] her juvy record, that's gotta be gone - like forever.
Tom Banachek: Come with me, we'll talk about your car.
Mikaela Banes: [to Sam] Thank you.
Agent Simmons: [forcing a smile] The man's an extortionist.
Sam Witwicky: Where's my car?
Tom Banachek: Son, I need you to listen to me very carefully. People can die here. We need to know everything you know and we need to know it now.
Sam Witwicky: Okay, but first I want my car, my parents - maybe you could write that down. Oh, and [looks at Mikaela] her juvy record, that's gotta be gone - like forever.
Tom Banachek: Come with me, we'll talk about your car.
Mikaela Banes: [to Sam] Thank you.
Agent Simmons: [forcing a smile] The man's an extortionist.
View Quote
Agent Simmons: All right, you've all had direct contact with the NBEs...
Tech Sgt. Epps: [confused] NBEs?
Agent Simmons: Non-Biological Extraterrestrials. Try to keep up with the acronyms.
Tom Banachek: What you're about to see is totally classified... [Megatron is revealed]
John Keller: [awestruck] Dear God, what is that?
Tom Banachek: We think that when he made his approach over the North Pole, our gravitational field screwed up his telemetry and crashed into the ice, probably a few thousand years age. We shipped him here to this facility in 1934.
Agent Simmons: We call him NBE-1.
Sam Witwicky: I don't mean to correct you on all that you think you know, but that's Megatron. He's the leader of the Decepticons.
Tom Banachek: He's been in cryo-stasis since 1935. Your great-great-grandfather made one of the greatest discoveries in the history of mankind.
Agent Simmons: Fact is, you're looking at the source of the modern age. The microchip, lasers, cars, space flight: all reverse-engineered by studying him. [sneers at Sam] NBE-1, that's what we call it!
John Keller: And you didn't think the United States Military might need to know that you're keeping a hostile alien robot frozen in the basement?
Agent Simmons: Until these events, we had no credible threats to national security.
John Keller: Well, you got one now!
Tech Sgt. Epps: [confused] NBEs?
Agent Simmons: Non-Biological Extraterrestrials. Try to keep up with the acronyms.
Tom Banachek: What you're about to see is totally classified... [Megatron is revealed]
John Keller: [awestruck] Dear God, what is that?
Tom Banachek: We think that when he made his approach over the North Pole, our gravitational field screwed up his telemetry and crashed into the ice, probably a few thousand years age. We shipped him here to this facility in 1934.
Agent Simmons: We call him NBE-1.
Sam Witwicky: I don't mean to correct you on all that you think you know, but that's Megatron. He's the leader of the Decepticons.
Tom Banachek: He's been in cryo-stasis since 1935. Your great-great-grandfather made one of the greatest discoveries in the history of mankind.
Agent Simmons: Fact is, you're looking at the source of the modern age. The microchip, lasers, cars, space flight: all reverse-engineered by studying him. [sneers at Sam] NBE-1, that's what we call it!
John Keller: And you didn't think the United States Military might need to know that you're keeping a hostile alien robot frozen in the basement?
Agent Simmons: Until these events, we had no credible threats to national security.
John Keller: Well, you got one now!
View Quote
[Frenzy has infiltrated Sector 7's bunker where the Allspark is located - all are speaking in Cybertronian]
Frenzy: Allspark located.
Starscream: This is Starscream. All Decepticons, mobilize.
Barricade: Barricade en-route.
Devastator: Devastator reporting.
Bonecrusher: Bonecrusher rolling.
Blackout: Blackout incoming. All hail Megatron!
Frenzy: Allspark located.
Starscream: This is Starscream. All Decepticons, mobilize.
Barricade: Barricade en-route.
Devastator: Devastator reporting.
Bonecrusher: Bonecrusher rolling.
Blackout: Blackout incoming. All hail Megatron!
View Quote
[Epps and Glen stare at the gashes in the Allspark chamber]
Tech Sgt. Epps: Whoa. Has Freddy Krueger been in here?
Glen Whitmann: Naw, man! Freddy Krueger's got four blades, that's only three! That's Wolverine! [growls and laughs] Right, that's Wolverine? [Epps looks very unimpressed]
Agent Simmons: That's very funny. [Glenn falls slient, offended] Does anyone have any mechanical devices? BlackBerry, key alarm, cell phone?
Glen Whitmann: I got a phone. [hands it to Simmons]
Agent Simmons: Nokias are real nasty. You gotta respect the Japanese; they know the way of the Samurai.
Maggie Madsen: Nokia's from Finland.
John Keller: Yes, but he's, uh... [quietly] you know, strange. He's a little strange.
[Simmons flips a switch, shooting electricity into the box; the cellphone transforms into a well-armed miniature robot that starts shooting at the box with a gatling gun]
Agent Simmons: We're able to harness the Cube's radiation and funnel it into that box. Mean little sucker, huh?
Maggie Madsen: That thing is freaky!
Agent Simmons: Kinda like the itty-bitty Energizer Bunny from Hell, huh?!
Tech Sgt. Epps: Whoa. Has Freddy Krueger been in here?
Glen Whitmann: Naw, man! Freddy Krueger's got four blades, that's only three! That's Wolverine! [growls and laughs] Right, that's Wolverine? [Epps looks very unimpressed]
Agent Simmons: That's very funny. [Glenn falls slient, offended] Does anyone have any mechanical devices? BlackBerry, key alarm, cell phone?
Glen Whitmann: I got a phone. [hands it to Simmons]
Agent Simmons: Nokias are real nasty. You gotta respect the Japanese; they know the way of the Samurai.
Maggie Madsen: Nokia's from Finland.
John Keller: Yes, but he's, uh... [quietly] you know, strange. He's a little strange.
[Simmons flips a switch, shooting electricity into the box; the cellphone transforms into a well-armed miniature robot that starts shooting at the box with a gatling gun]
Agent Simmons: We're able to harness the Cube's radiation and funnel it into that box. Mean little sucker, huh?
Maggie Madsen: That thing is freaky!
Agent Simmons: Kinda like the itty-bitty Energizer Bunny from Hell, huh?!
View Quote
[Sector 7 agents and the special forces are in a Mexican standoff after Sam demands the return of Bumblebee]
Agent Simmons: There's an alien war going on, and you wanna start shooting?!
Capt. Lennox: We didn't ask to be here.
Agent Simmons: I'm ordering you under S7 executive jurisdiction!
Tech Sgt. Epps: S7 don't exist!
Capt. Lennox: Yeah, and we don't take orders from people who don't exist!
Agent Simmons: I'm gonna count to five.
Capt. Lennox: I'm gonna count to three. [grabs Simmons by the collar and shoves the muzzle of his pistol into the Sector 7 agent's chest]
John Keller: SIMMONS!
Agent Simmons: Yeah?
John Keller: I'd do as he says. Losing's really not an option for these guys.
Agent Simmons: [to Lennox] Okay, okay. You want to lay the fate of the world on the kid's Camaro? That's cool.
Agent Simmons: There's an alien war going on, and you wanna start shooting?!
Capt. Lennox: We didn't ask to be here.
Agent Simmons: I'm ordering you under S7 executive jurisdiction!
Tech Sgt. Epps: S7 don't exist!
Capt. Lennox: Yeah, and we don't take orders from people who don't exist!
Agent Simmons: I'm gonna count to five.
Capt. Lennox: I'm gonna count to three. [grabs Simmons by the collar and shoves the muzzle of his pistol into the Sector 7 agent's chest]
John Keller: SIMMONS!
Agent Simmons: Yeah?
John Keller: I'd do as he says. Losing's really not an option for these guys.
Agent Simmons: [to Lennox] Okay, okay. You want to lay the fate of the world on the kid's Camaro? That's cool.
View Quote
Bumblebee: [through his radio] Message from Starfleet, Captain. Let's get to it!
Capt. Lennox: He's right. If we stay here, we're screwed with Megatron in the other hanger. Mission City is 22 miles away. We're going to sneak that Cube out of here and hide it somewhere in the city.
John Keller: Good, right!
Capt. Lennox: But we cannot make a stand without the Air Force.
John Keller: This place must have some sort of radio link.
Agent Simmons: Yes!
John Keller: Short wave, CB.
Agent Simmons: Right, yes!
Capt. Lennox: [to Keller] Sir, you're going to have to find some way to get word out of them. Let's move!
Agent Simmons: [to Keller] In the alien archives, sir! There's an old Army radio console!
John Keller: Will it work?
Agent Simmons: Anything's possible! Did you see that...?
Capt. Lennox: He's right. If we stay here, we're screwed with Megatron in the other hanger. Mission City is 22 miles away. We're going to sneak that Cube out of here and hide it somewhere in the city.
John Keller: Good, right!
Capt. Lennox: But we cannot make a stand without the Air Force.
John Keller: This place must have some sort of radio link.
Agent Simmons: Yes!
John Keller: Short wave, CB.
Agent Simmons: Right, yes!
Capt. Lennox: [to Keller] Sir, you're going to have to find some way to get word out of them. Let's move!
Agent Simmons: [to Keller] In the alien archives, sir! There's an old Army radio console!
John Keller: Will it work?
Agent Simmons: Anything's possible! Did you see that...?
View Quote
[The humans and Autobots are fleeing Hoover Dam; the Allspark is in Bumblebee's backseat]
Sam Witwicky: The Cube's okay?
Mikaela Banes: Yeah, it's fine.
Sam Witwicky: Put the seatbelt on.
Sam Witwicky: The Cube's okay?
Mikaela Banes: Yeah, it's fine.
Sam Witwicky: Put the seatbelt on.
View Quote
Starscream: I live to serve you, Lord Megatron!
Megatron: Where is the Cube?
Starscream: The humans have taken it!
Megatron: [growls] You failed me yet again, Starscream. GET THEM!
Megatron: Where is the Cube?
Starscream: The humans have taken it!
Megatron: [growls] You failed me yet again, Starscream. GET THEM!
View Quote
Tech Sgt. Epps: [radioing to a lone F-22 flying overhead] Raptor, Raptor, do you copy? We have you visual. Green smoke is the mark, provide air cover and vector Black Hawks for extraction.
[The F-22, guided by the smoke, turns and head for them, but there's no answer]
Ironhide: [transforms] It's Starscream!
Tech Sgt. Epps: Please tell me you copy...
Ironhide: Back up, take cover! Bumblebee...!
[With Bumblebee's help, Ironhide grabs a truck and uses it as a shield as Starscream comes closer]
Capt. Lennox: Oh no, no, no, no, MOVE!
Ironhide: Back up! Back up! Incoming!
Capt. Lennox: Retreat, fall back!
[Starscream strafes the ground, blasting everyone to the ground]
Capt. Lennox: What the hell was that?
Tech Sgt. Epps: What are you talking about?
Capt. Lennox: What do you mean, what am I talking about? They shot at us!
Tech Sgt. Epps: F-22 pilots would never fly below buildings! That's alien! That ain't friendly!
[The F-22, guided by the smoke, turns and head for them, but there's no answer]
Ironhide: [transforms] It's Starscream!
Tech Sgt. Epps: Please tell me you copy...
Ironhide: Back up, take cover! Bumblebee...!
[With Bumblebee's help, Ironhide grabs a truck and uses it as a shield as Starscream comes closer]
Capt. Lennox: Oh no, no, no, no, MOVE!
Ironhide: Back up! Back up! Incoming!
Capt. Lennox: Retreat, fall back!
[Starscream strafes the ground, blasting everyone to the ground]
Capt. Lennox: What the hell was that?
Tech Sgt. Epps: What are you talking about?
Capt. Lennox: What do you mean, what am I talking about? They shot at us!
Tech Sgt. Epps: F-22 pilots would never fly below buildings! That's alien! That ain't friendly!
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Jazz: Is that all you got, Megatron?
Megatron: Come here, little cretin!
Jazz: You want a piece of me? You want a piece?!
Megatron: No! I want two! [rips Jazz in half]
Megatron: Come here, little cretin!
Jazz: You want a piece of me? You want a piece?!
Megatron: No! I want two! [rips Jazz in half]
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Captain Lennox: Sam, where's the Cube?
Sam Witwicky: [pointing to the ground] Right there!
Captain Lennox: Right! Here, take this flare! Take the Cube, and head to that building! Get to the top, and light a flare! There's some Black Hawks coming! One of them will come to you and get in and take and take the Cube to the authorities!
Sam Witwicky: What? No, I can't do this!
Captain Lennox: Listen to me! You're a soldier now! All right, I need you take this Cube, get it into military hands while we hold them off, or a lot of people are gonna die. [to Mikaela] You got to go, you got to go.
Mikaela Banes: No, I'm not leaving.
Captain Lennox: You need to go.
Mikaela Banes: No, I'm not leaving till I get Bumblebee out of here, okay?
Ironhide: Sam, we will protect you.
Captain Lennox: Epps, where are those planes?
Mikaela Banes: Sam, no matter what happens... I'm really glad I got in that car with you.
Ironhide: Sam, get to the building! Move!
Sam Witwicky: [pointing to the ground] Right there!
Captain Lennox: Right! Here, take this flare! Take the Cube, and head to that building! Get to the top, and light a flare! There's some Black Hawks coming! One of them will come to you and get in and take and take the Cube to the authorities!
Sam Witwicky: What? No, I can't do this!
Captain Lennox: Listen to me! You're a soldier now! All right, I need you take this Cube, get it into military hands while we hold them off, or a lot of people are gonna die. [to Mikaela] You got to go, you got to go.
Mikaela Banes: No, I'm not leaving.
Captain Lennox: You need to go.
Mikaela Banes: No, I'm not leaving till I get Bumblebee out of here, okay?
Ironhide: Sam, we will protect you.
Captain Lennox: Epps, where are those planes?
Mikaela Banes: Sam, no matter what happens... I'm really glad I got in that car with you.
Ironhide: Sam, get to the building! Move!
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Optimus Prime: [dives into battle and transforms] Megatron!
Megatron: [tosses Jazz's dismembered corpse aside] PRIME!
Megatron: [tosses Jazz's dismembered corpse aside] PRIME!
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Megatron: Humans don't deserve to live!
Optimus Prime: They deserve to choose for themselves!
Megatron: Then you shall die with them!! [throws Prime a distance away; he joins his arms together, forming his fusion cannon] JOIN THEM IN EXTINCTION!!
Optimus Prime: They deserve to choose for themselves!
Megatron: Then you shall die with them!! [throws Prime a distance away; he joins his arms together, forming his fusion cannon] JOIN THEM IN EXTINCTION!!
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Megatron: Is it fear or courage that compels you, fleshling?
Sam Witwicky: [terrified] Oh my God... Where do I go?
Megatron: Give me the Allspark, and you may live to be my pet.
Sam Witwicky: [still making a stand] I'M NEVER GIVING YOU THIS ALL SPARK!
Megatron: Oh, so unwise...
[With a roar, Megatron pulls out a flair from his arm and smashes the rooftop, sending a screaming Sam plummeting towards the ground]
Optimus Prime: [grabbing Sam] I got you, boy! Hold on to the Cube!
[Prime leaps down, but Megatron grabs him, and all three tumble down into the street]
Sam Witwicky: [terrified] Oh my God... Where do I go?
Megatron: Give me the Allspark, and you may live to be my pet.
Sam Witwicky: [still making a stand] I'M NEVER GIVING YOU THIS ALL SPARK!
Megatron: Oh, so unwise...
[With a roar, Megatron pulls out a flair from his arm and smashes the rooftop, sending a screaming Sam plummeting towards the ground]
Optimus Prime: [grabbing Sam] I got you, boy! Hold on to the Cube!
[Prime leaps down, but Megatron grabs him, and all three tumble down into the street]
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Optimus Prime: Sam, you risked your life to protect the Cube?
Sam Witwicky: No sacrifice, no victory.
Optimus Prime: If I cannot defeat Megatron, you must push the Cube into my chest. I will sacrifice myself to destroy it. Get behind me. [Sam does so] It's you and me, Megatron!
Megatron: No, it's just me, Prime!
Optimus Prime: At the end of this day, one shall stand... one shall fall!
Megatron: You still fight for the weak! That is why you lose!
Sam Witwicky: No sacrifice, no victory.
Optimus Prime: If I cannot defeat Megatron, you must push the Cube into my chest. I will sacrifice myself to destroy it. Get behind me. [Sam does so] It's you and me, Megatron!
Megatron: No, it's just me, Prime!
Optimus Prime: At the end of this day, one shall stand... one shall fall!
Megatron: You still fight for the weak! That is why you lose!
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Megatron: [to Sam] I'll kill you...! Mine! Allspark!
Optimus Prime: Sam, put the Cube in my chest now! Sam! No, Sam!
[Sam rams the Cube into Megatron's chest, destroying him]
Optimus Prime: [to Megatron's destroyed corpse] You left me no choice, brother. Sam, I owe you my life. We are in your debt.
Ironhide: [hands Jazz's corpse] Prime, we couldn't save him.
Optimus Prime: Oh, Jazz. [referring to the humans] We lost a great comrade, but gained new ones. Thank you, all of you. You honor us with your bravery.
Bumblebee: [fully repaired] Permission to speak, sir?
Optimus Prime: Permission granted, old friend.
Sam Witwicky: You speak now?
Bumblebee: I wish to stay with the boy.
Optimus Prime: If that is his wish.
Sam Witwicky: Yes!
Optimus Prime: Sam, put the Cube in my chest now! Sam! No, Sam!
[Sam rams the Cube into Megatron's chest, destroying him]
Optimus Prime: [to Megatron's destroyed corpse] You left me no choice, brother. Sam, I owe you my life. We are in your debt.
Ironhide: [hands Jazz's corpse] Prime, we couldn't save him.
Optimus Prime: Oh, Jazz. [referring to the humans] We lost a great comrade, but gained new ones. Thank you, all of you. You honor us with your bravery.
Bumblebee: [fully repaired] Permission to speak, sir?
Optimus Prime: Permission granted, old friend.
Sam Witwicky: You speak now?
Bumblebee: I wish to stay with the boy.
Optimus Prime: If that is his wish.
Sam Witwicky: Yes!
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News Reporter: Can you shed any light on the recent, so-called alien activity in this area?
Judy Witwicky: Do you know what? I think that if there really was some sort of alien infestation...
Ron Witwicky: [fondling Mojo] Yeah. They, the government, would be the first to let you know.
Judy Witwicky: The government would let us know.
Ron Witwicky: Yeah. I mean, this is America.
Judy Witwicky: You know, that's how we live in a free land, there are no secrets. They'd say "Hey! Duck and cover!" Your head is kind of a different size that it is on television.
Judy Witwicky: Do you know what? I think that if there really was some sort of alien infestation...
Ron Witwicky: [fondling Mojo] Yeah. They, the government, would be the first to let you know.
Judy Witwicky: The government would let us know.
Ron Witwicky: Yeah. I mean, this is America.
Judy Witwicky: You know, that's how we live in a free land, there are no secrets. They'd say "Hey! Duck and cover!" Your head is kind of a different size that it is on television.