Who Framed Roger Rabbit quotes

View Quote Eddie Valiant: What's with him?
Betty Boop: Mr. Acme never misses a night when Jessica performs.
Eddie Valiant: Got a thing for rabbits, huh?

View Quote Eddie Valiant: You crazy rabbit! I'm out there risking my neck for you, and what are you doing? Singing and dancing!
Roger Rabbit: But I'm a toon. Toons are supposed to make people laugh.
Eddie Valiant: Sit down!
Roger Rabbit: You don't understand. Those people needed to laugh.
Eddie Valiant: Then when they're done laughing, they'll call the cops. That guy Angelo would rat on you for a nickel.
Roger Rabbit: Not Angelo. He'd never turn me in.
Eddie Valiant: Why? Because you made him laugh?
Roger Rabbit: That's right! A laugh can be a very powerful thing. Why, sometimes in life, it's the only weapon we have.

View Quote Jessica Rabbit: Oh, no. Where's Roger?
Eddie Valiant: Roger? He chickened out on me back at the studio.
Jessica Rabbit: No, he didn't. I hit him in the head with a frying pan and put him in the trunk, so he wouldn't get hurt.
Eddie Valiant: Makes perfect sense.

View Quote Jessica Rabbit: Well, we're not going anywhere in my car. Let's take yours.
Eddie Valiant: I have a feeling someone already did.
Jessica Rabbit: From the looks of it I'd say it was Roger. My honey bunny was never very good behind the wheel.
Eddie Valiant: Better lover than a driver, huh?
Jessica Rabbit: You'd better believe it, buster.

View Quote Jessica Rabbit: You don't know how hard it is being a woman looking the way I do.
Eddie Valiant: You don't know how hard it is being a man looking at a woman looking the way you do.
Jessica Rabbit: I'm not bad. I'm just drawn that way.

View Quote Judge Doom: Can you guess what this is?
Jessica Rabbit: Oh my God, it's DIP!!!
Judge Doom: That's right, my dear! Enough to dip Toontown off the face of the earth! A vehicle of my own design. Five thousand gallons of heated dip, pumped at enormous velocity through a pressurized water cannon. Toontown will be erased in a matter of minutes.

View Quote Judge Doom: Several months ago I had the good providence to stumble upon this plan of the city council's. A construction plan of epic proportions. They're calling it a freeway.
Eddie Valiant: Freeway? What the hell's a freeway?
Judge Doom: Eight lanes of shimmering cement running from here to Pasadena. Smooth, safe, fast. Traffic jams will be a thing of the past.
Eddie Valiant: So that's why you killed Acme and Maroon? For this freeway? I don't get it.
Judge Doom: Of course not. You lack vision. I see a place where people get on and off the freeway. On and off, off and on all day, all night. Soon, where Toontown once stood will be a string of gas stations, inexpensive motels, restaurants that serve rapidly prepared food. Tire salons, automobile dealerships and wonderful, wonderful billboards reaching as far as the eye can see. My God, it'll be beautiful.
Eddie Valiant: Come on! Nobody's going to drive this lousy freeway when they can take the Red Car for a nickel.
Judge Doom: Oh, they'll drive. They'll have to. You see, I bought the Red Car so I could dismantle it.

View Quote Judge Doom: You wouldn't have any idea where the rabbit might be, Mr. Valiant?
Eddie Valiant: Have you tried Walla Walla? Cucamonga? I hear Kokomo's very nice this time of the year.
Judge Doom: I'm surprised you're not more cooperative, Mr. Valiant. A human has been murdered by a toon. Don't you appreciate the magnitude of that?

View Quote Lt. Santino: Judge Doom killed Marvin Acme.
Eddie Valiant: And R. K. Maroon and my brother.
Lt. Santino: That's what I call one seriously disturbed toon.

View Quote R.K. Maroon: How much do you know about show business, Mr. Valiant?
Eddie Valiant: Only that there is no business like it, no business I know.
R.K. Maroon: Yeah. And there's no business more expensive. I'm 25 grand over budget on the latest Baby Herman cartoon. You saw the rabbit blowing his lines. He can't keep his mind on his job. You know why?
Eddie Valiant: One too many refrigerators dropped on his head?
R.K. Maroon: Nah, he's a toon. You can drop anything you want on his head, he'll shake it off. But break his heart, goes to pieces just like you and me.

View Quote R.K. Maroon: Kinda jumpy, aren't you, Valiant? It's just Dumbo.
Eddie Valiant: I know who it is.
R.K. Maroon: I got him on loan from Disney. Him and half the cast of Fantasia. the best part is, they work for "peanuts".

View Quote R.K. Maroon: What are you going to do to me, Valiant?
Eddie Valiant: I'm going to listen to you spin the Cloverleaf scenario; the story of greed, sex and murder. And the parts that I don't like, I'm going to edit out.
R.K. Maroon: You got it all wrong, I'm a cartoon maker, not a murderer!
Eddie Valiant: Everybody's gotta have a hobby.

View Quote Raoul J. Raoul: Cut!
Cameraman: All right. That's it, Jack!
Raoul J. Raoul: Cut, cut, cut, cut, cut!
Baby Herman: What the hell was wrong with that take?!
Raoul J. Raoul: Nothing with you, Baby Herman. You were great. You were perfect. You were better than perfect! It's just Roger, he keeps blowing his lines! Roger, what is this?
Roger Rabbit: A tweeting bird?
Raoul J. Raoul: "A tweeting bird?!" Roger, read this script! Look what it says. It says, "Rabbit gets clunked, rabbit sees stars." Not birds, stars! Can we lose the playback, please! You're killing me, killing me!
Baby Herman: For crying out loud, Roger! How the hell many times we have to do this damn scene?! Raoul! I'll be in my trailer, takin' a nap! [Walks between a woman's legs]
Woman: Wooo!
Baby Herman: 'Scuse me, toots.
Raoul J. Raoul: My stomach can't take this. This is a mess, clean this set up! Get him out of there, or seal him up in it. Lose the lights! Say Lunch! That's lunch we're on a half!
Roger Rabbit: P-p-please, Raoul. I can give you stars. Just drop the refrigerator on my head one more time.
Raoul J. Raoul: Roger, I've dropped it on your head 23 times already.
Roger Rabbit: I can take it, don't worry about me.
Raoul J. Raoul: I'm not worried about you. I'm worried about the refrigerator.

View Quote Roger Rabbit: No! Not my Jessica! Not patty-cake! This is impossible! I don't believe it! It can't be! It just can't be! Jessica's my wife! It's absolutely impossible! Jessica's the love of my life. The apple of my eye. The cream in my coffee.
Eddie Valiant: Well you better start drinking it black, Acme's taking the cream now.

View Quote Roger Rabbit: Okay, nobody move! All right, weasel, grab some sky or I'll let the judge have it! You heard me, I said drop it!
Jessica Rabbit: Roger, darling!
Roger Rabbit: That's right, my dear. I'd love to embrace you, but first, I have to satisfy my sense of moral outrage!
Judge Doom: Put that gun down, you buck-toothed fool!
Roger Rabbit: That's it, Doom. Give me another excuse to pop you full of lead. So you thought you could get away with it, didn't you? Ha! We toons may act idiotic, but we're not stupid. We demand justice. Why, the real meaning of the word probably hits you like a "ton of bricks"!
[a ton of bricks falls on Roger]
Jessica Rabbit: Roger! Roger, say something!
Roger Rabbit: Look, stars! Ready when you are, Raoul.
Judge Doom: Tie the lovebirds together.