Mean Girls quotes

View Quote (to Jason) Why are you such a skeez?

View Quote [Nice wig Janis, what's it made of?] [Replies] Your mom's chest hair!

View Quote Bethany Byrd: Somebody wrote in that book that I'm lying about being a virgin because I use super jumbo tampons... but I can't help it if I've got a heavy flow and a wide set vagina!
Mr. Duvall: ... yeah, I can't do this.

View Quote Betsy Heron: Where's Cady?
Chip Heron: She went out.
Betsy Heron: She's grounded.
Chip Heron: [surprised] Are they not allowed out when they're grounded?

View Quote Betsy Heron: Where's Cady?
Chip Heron: She went out.
Betsy Heron: She's grounded.
Chip Heron: Are they not allowed out when they're grounded?

View Quote Cady: [after humiliating Regina] Wait, Regina, I didn't mean for this to happen!
Regina: To find out that everyone hates me? I don't care!
Cady: Wait, Regina, just listen!
Regina: No! Do you know what everyone says about you? Hmm? They say that you're a homeschooled jungle freak, that's a less hot version of me! Yeah! So don't try to act so innocent! You can take that fake apology, and shove it right up your hairy- [Regina gets hit by a bus]

View Quote Cady: And they have this book, this burn book, where they write mean things about all the girls in our grade.
Janis: What does it say about me?
Cady: [lying] You're not in it.
Janis: Those bitches.

View Quote Cady: Hey!... Are we still in a fight?
Janis: Are you still an asshole?
Cady: No. I don't think so.

View Quote Cady: Hey!
Regina: Why were you talking to Janis Ian?
Cady: I don't know, I mean, she's so weird, she just came up to me and started talking to me about crack.
Regina: She's so pathetic. Let me tell you something about Janis Ian. We were best friends in middle school. I know, right? It's so embarrassing. I don't even... whatever. So then in eighth grade, I started going out with my first boyfriend, Kyle, who was totally gorgeous. But then he moved to Indiana, and Janis was like, weirdly jealous of him. Like, if I would blow her off to hang out with Kyle, she'd be like "Why didn't you call me back?". And I'd be like "Why are you so obsessed with me?". So then, for my birthday party, which was an all-girls pool party, I was like "Janis, I can't invite you because I think you're a lesbian". I mean, I couldn't have a lesbian at my party. There were gonna be girls there in their bathing suits. I mean, right? She was a lesbian. So then her mom called my mom and started yelling at her, it was so ****ed. And then she dropped out of school because no one would talk to her, and she came back in the fall for high school, all of her hair was cut off and she was totally weird, and now I guess she's on crack.

View Quote Cady: I think I'm joining the Mathletes.
Regina, Gretchen, and Karen: NO! No, no!
Regina: You cannot do that. That is social suicide. Damn! You are so lucky you have us to guide you.

View Quote Cady: Oh, God...
Janis: You dirty little liar!
Cady: I'm sorry, I can explain.
Janis: Explain what? How you forgot to invite us to your "cool party"?
Damian: Janis, I cannot stop this car. I have a curfew.
Cady: You know I couldn't invite you! I had to pretend to be plastic!
Janis: But you're not pretending anymore! You're plastic! Cold, shiny, hard plastic!
Damian: Curfew, 1 a.m., it is now 1:10.
Janis: Did you have an awesome time? Did you drink awesome shooters, listen to awesome music, and just sit around and soak up each others' awesomeness?
Cady: You know what? You're the one who made me like this so you could use me for your eighth grade revenge!
Janis: God! See, at least me and Regina George know we're mean! But you try to act so innocent like, "Oh, I use to live in Africa with all the little birdies, and the little monkeys!"
Cady: You know what! It's not my fault you're like, in love with me, or something!
Janis: What?
Damian [abruptly stops the car]: Oh no she did not!
Janis: See, that's the thing with you Plastics, you think everyone's in love with you, but in realitly, everyone *hates* you, like Aaron Samuels for example! He broke up with Regina and guess what, he still doesn't want you, Cady! So why are you still messing with Regina? I'll tell you why, because you are a mean girl, you're a bitch! Here, you can have this, it won a prize.
[Damian drives away with Janis, yelling out the window]
Damian: And I want my pink shirt back! I WANT MY PINK SHIRT BACK!

View Quote Cady: She took him back. Regina took Aaron back.
Janis: Oh, no, Cady...
Cady: Why would she do that?
Janis: 'Cause she's a life ruiner. She ruins people's lives.

View Quote Cady: So, are you gonna send any candy canes?
Regina: No. I don't send them, I just get them. So you better send me one, biatch. Love ya, bye! *blows kiss*

View Quote Cady: Wow. Your house is really nice.
Regina: I know, right?
Gretchen: [whispering] Make sure you check out her mom's boob job. They're hard as rocks!

View Quote Cady: You're not stupid, Karen.
Karen: No, I am actually. I'm failing almost everything.
Cady: Well... there must be something you're good at.
Karen: I can stick my whole fist in my mouth. Wanna see?
Cady: No no no... Anything else?
Karen: Well... I'm kinda psychic. I have a fifth sense.
Cady: What do you mean?
Karen: It's like I have ESPN or something. My breasts can always tell when it's going to rain.
Cady: Really? That's amazing.
Karen: Well... they can tell when it's raining.