Monsters vs. Aliens quotes

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View Quote Derek Deitl: [rejecting Susan] Don't crush me for saying this, but I'm not looking to get married and spend the rest of my life in someone else's shadow. And you're casting a pretty big shadow.

View Quote TV Reporter: Once again, a UFO has landed in America - the only country UFOs ever seem to land in!

View Quote Wedding Guest: [after Susan grows to her massive height] Here comes the bride!

View Quote Cuthbert: Don't rush me, Katie; I'm just not ready.
Katie: Oh, relax, Cuthbert, it's just like dancing.

View Quote Derek: Wow! You really are big.
Ginormica: Yeah, but I'm still me. I'm still the girl you fell in love with.
Derek: Except you destroyed the Golden Gate Bridge.
Ginormica: But that was the only way I could defeat the alien robot! Did you ever think I could do that?!
Derek: No, I didn't. I can honestly say that it never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever occurred to me.
Ginormica: Look, I know this is all a little weird - okay, it's a lot weird - but I'm sure we can get through this. Together, we can find a way to get me back to normal.
Derek: Susan, try to look at this from my perspective. I have an audience that depends on me for news, weather, sports and heart-warming fluff pieces. So you expect me to put all that on hold while you try to undo this thing that happened to you, that I had absolutely nothing to do with?
Ginormica: Yes, that's exactly what I expect. What about the life we always wanted? Don't you still want that?
Derek: Of course. I just, don't see... don't see how I can have that with you.
Ginormica: [On the verge of tears] Derek, please. Don't do this.
Derek: You have to face facts, Susan. And don't crush me for saying this, but I'm not looking to get married and spend the rest of my life on someone else's shadow. And you're casting a pretty big shadow. I'm sorry. It's over. Good luck, Susan.

View Quote Dr. ****roach: [about B.O.B.] Forgive him, but as you can see, he has no brain.
B.O.B.: Turns out, you don't need one! Totally overrated! As a matter of fact, I don't even have to... [starts gasping for air] I forgot how to breathe! Help me, Dr. ****roach!
Dr. ****roach: [exasperated] Suck in, B.O.B.
B.O.B.: [breathes normally] Thanks, Doc. You're a lifesaver.

View Quote Dr. ****roach: [to Ginormica after they rescue her] My dear, no matter what your size, you'll always be... [notices the Gallaxhar clones coming and pulls Ginormica down by the suit, shaking her] nothing but a filthy carbon-based lifeform!
Gallaxhar Clones: Hail Gallaxar.
Dr. ****roach: Hail Gallaxar.

View Quote Gallaxhar: [after extracting the quantonium from Ginormica, shrinking her back to human-size] Now I can finally rebuild my civilization on a new planet! Any ideas on where I could set up shop? Your planet, perhaps?
Ginormica: You keep your slimy tentacles off my planet--! [tries to attack him, but he holds her back at tentacle-length]
Gallaxhar: Or what? If you wanted to stop me, you should have done it when you possessed the quantonium. Now you're nothing.
Ginormica: There are innocent people down there who haven't done anything!
Gallaxhar: There were innocent people on my home planet, before it was destroyed!
Ginormica: Look, I'm sorry your planet was destroyed—
Gallaxhar: Uh, don't be! I'm the one who destroyed it. Confused? After I reveal my tale to you, everything will become crystal clear. Computer! Initialize cloning machine!
Gallaxhar's Computer: Yes, carefully.
[Gallaxhar gets into the cloning machine with a mold that matches his body]
Gallaxhar: Many zentons ago, when I was but a squidling, I found out that my parents were... [The machine closes down, scans his body and opens up again] No child should ever have to endure that! So I went on the road with a giant... [The machine closes down again and scans his body and opens up once again] ...And then thereafter was married! Things were going well. Until she wanted... [The machine closes down a third time and opens up] So then, I was all, "No way!" And then she was all, "Yes way!" And then I was like... [The machine closes down a fourth time and opens up] But I told you too much already! [He steps out of the machine] Let the birth of my new planet called... Uh... Gallaxhar's Planet, begin! Yes, thank you!

View Quote Gallaxhar: You must be terrified. Waking up in a strange place, wearing strange clothes, imprisoned by a strange being on a strange hovering device? Strange, isn't it?
Ginormica: Hardly. It's not the first time.
Gallaxhar: [Pauses, deflated] Wow. You really get around. To the extraction chamber!
[The machine imprisoning Ginormica, who wears a skintight suit, begins to follow Gallaxhar through the ship]
Ginormica: Look, what is it that you want with me?
Gallaxhar: You have stolen what is rightfully mine!
Ginormica: I didn't steal anything from you!
Gallaxhar: Your enormous, grotesque body contains quantonium, the most powerful substance in the universe. Did you really think you could keep it from me?
Ginormica: ...That's what this is all about?! You destroyed San Francisco, you terrified millions of people, you killed my friend, just to get to me?!
Gallaxhar: "Wha-ka-ka-ka-ka!" Silence! Your voice is grating on my earknubs!

View Quote Mama Dietl: One thumb's shorter than the other. It runs in the family.
Susan: Derek doesn't have that--
Mama Dietl: Ah, it skips a generation. But your kids are gonna have it! [laughs maniacally]

View Quote Missing Link: She's speechless!
B.O.B.: "She"?!
Dr. ****roach: Yes, B.O.B., we are in the presence of a rare female monster.
B.O.B.: No way, it's a boy! Look at his boobies!
[Awkward silence]
Missing Link: We need to have a talk.
Dr. ****roach: Gentlemen, I'm afraid we're not making a very good first impression.
Missing Link: Well, at least I'm talking! First new monster in years, and we couldn't get, like, a wolfman or a mummy? You know, someone I can play cards with.
Dr. ****roach: Might we ask for your name, madam?
Susan: Susan.
B.O.B.: No, no, no, we mean your monster name. What do people scream when they see you coming? You know, like "Look out! Here comes..."?
Susan: Susan.
[Silence]
Dr. ****roach: Really?
B.O.B.: [spookily] Susan! Ooh, I just scared myself! That is scary!
Missing Link: Yes. Eat time.

View Quote Missing Link: So, how was Derek?
Ginormica: ...Derek's a selfish jerk.
B.O.B.: No!
Ginormica: Yes. All that talk about us - "I'm so proud of us", "Us just got a job in Fresno" - There was no us, it was just Derek. Why did I have to get hit by a meteor to see that? I was such an idiot! [kicks the roof of the gas station, sending B.O.B. flying] Why did I think life with Derek would be so great anyway?! I mean, look at all the stuff I've done without him. Fighting an alien robot? That was me, not him! And that was amazing! Meeting you guys... [gets down on her knees so she can be face-to-face with the other monsters] amazing. [turns to Dr. ****roach] Dr. ****roach! You can crawl up walls and build a super-computer out of a pizza box, two cans of hairspray, and-!
Dr. ****roach: And a paper clip!
Ginormica: Amazing! [turns to Missing Link] And you! You hardly need an introduction; you're the Missing Link! You personally carried 250 co-eds off Cocoa Beach and still had the strength to fight off the National Guard!
Missing Link: [proudly] And the Coast Guard! And also the lifeguard.
Ginormica: Amazing! [B.O.B. lands next to the other monsters.] B.O.B.! [turns him around so he's facing her] Who else could fall from unimaginable heights and end up without a single scratch?
B.O.B.: [points to Missing Link] Link?
Ginormica: [correcting him] You.
B.O.B.: Amazing!
[Insectosaurus roars]
Missing Link: Good point, Insecto'! Susan, don't shortchange yourself.
Ginormica: Uh, I'm not gonna shortchange myself. [stands at full height again] Ever again.

View Quote Susan: [meeting General Monger] Uh, thank goodness! A real person! [notices his jetpack] You are a real person, right? You're not one of those half-person, half-machine, whatever you call those things?
General W.R. Monger: A cyborg?
Susan: [panicked] Uh, no! You're a cyborg!
General W.R. Monger: Ma'am, I can assure you I am not a cyborg. The name is General Warren R. Monger. I'm in charge of this facility.

View Quote Susan: Now open the doors!
Gallaxhar: Even if I wanted to, I couldn't! That's what happens when you set a ship to self-destruct! Now we're all gonna die! And there's nothing you can do about it, Susan.
Susan: I wouldn't be so sure. And the name... is Ginormica! [fires the weapon she is carrying into the statue, so that the quantonium-filled globe it holds falls on her]