Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby quotes
142 total quotesMultiple Characters
Reese Bobby
Ricky Bobby
Texas Ranger Bobby
Walker Bobby
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Hey losing is never fun but here's a little something to keep your spirits up.... (flips bird) its real nice... got it at Target.... It's on sale.
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Hi, I'm Ricky Bobby. Christmas is just around the corner, and what better gift to give a loved one [pulls out knife] than the Jack Hawk 9000? Available at Wal-Mart!
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Hold on a second, Mr. Fancy-Pants Foreigner. You just broke my bro's arm. Now you're gonna get tasered. Say hello to Dr. Watts!
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I like to think of Jesus as wearin' a Tuxedo T-shirt, 'cause it says, like, "I want to be formal, but I'm here to party too." I like to party, so I like my Jesus to party.
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I like to think of Jesus like a ninja, fightin' off evil samurai.
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I like to think of Jesus with like giant eagles wings and singin' lead vocals for lynyrd skynyrd with like an Angel Band, and 'm in the front row, and 'm hammered drunk...
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I sent in my application to The Real World, so I'm hoping to hear back from that. I'm putting a lot of my eggs into that basket, the MTV basket. I'm also thinking about getting a gun, and dealing crack. Being a crack dealer. Not, like, a mean crack dealer, but like... like a nice one. Kinda friendly, like, "Hey, what's up guys? You want some crack?". I'm just waiting on those two things to just kinda flesh themselves out.
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I told you not to put the damn onions on my steak
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I'm gonna scissor-kick you in the back of the head!
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I'm not sure what to do with my hands.
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I'm Ricky Bobby. If you don't chew Big Red, then **** you.
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I'm ten years old, but I'll beat your ass!
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If it isn't our mangy, transient grandfather!"
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If you ain't first, you're last!
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In the words of the late great Colonel Sanders: I'm too drunk to taste this chicken