Superbad quotes

View Quote These girls are 18 years old, they're not dried up old ladies, they're good to go!

View Quote They literally made me stop eating foods that were shaped like dicks. No hotdogs, no popsicles. You know how many foods are shaped like dicks? The best kind!

View Quote This jobs isn't really how y'know shows like CSI make it out to be. I mean when I first joined the force I assumed there was semen on everything! And there was some sort of semen database that had every bad guy's semen in it. There isn't! That doesn't exist! It'd be nice. Like that crime scene today; If the man had ejaculated and then punched you in the face, we would have a real good shot at catching him! But no.. just a punch in the face, no semen... Story of my life...

View Quote To women... To the respect, to people respecting women...

View Quote Wait are you guys still picking me up from work?... Can you answer me?

View Quote Watch your step, I fell earlier today. Well I was hit by a car, it's a long story.

View Quote Were you violating that girl?! Did you just violate her with your penis?!

View Quote Why am I even playing this if I can't beat it?

View Quote Why the **** would it be between that and Muhammed?

View Quote Why would you park in the staff parking lot? I mean because you're not staff...

View Quote Wow that's really messed up. Super-gay.

View Quote Yeah but they don't really show dick going in, which is a huge concern... Plus, have you ever seen a vagina by itself?.... Not for me...

View Quote Yeah well, at least you got to suck your dad's dick.

View Quote Yeah, well, while you guys are at Dartmouth, I'll be over at State where the girls are half as smart and thus twice as likely to fellace(sic) me.

View Quote You bitched out, ****ing Judas!